A watermelon, a cherry, a mango, and a peanut are sitting at the table for dinner. They are all eating chicken wings and watching the superbowl between the Packers and the Patriots. What is wrong with the situation? Well two things are wrong, cherry's cannot communicate with peanuts because they speak different languages(obviously). And the patriots fucking suck.

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the WNBA.

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What did the golfer do on his vacation? He played golf.

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what do grown up's do at night when everyone lese is asleep? Go to sleep as well

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Bacon makes everything delicious, yes? And coffee makes everything exciting, yes? Put the two together and you get a caffeinated porky roller coaster in your mouth.

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Whats worse than one dead Baby in ten trash cans Getting raped by kobe

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I walk in to a bar, ask for a beer, get drunk, walk away and.... hmmm.. how could I finish the joke??..

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Sharing means caring, Caring is socialism

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Your Mother is so ugly that men tend to avoid her.

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Why did a black man toss a bowl into the air? Because he just got it from the microwave and it was extremely hot.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue.... I hate your guts.

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your in court a woman police officer says anything you say can and will be held against you. the man replies titty

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Girl 1: I just can't find the man who'll make the perfect husband for me. Girl 2: Maybe you're asking for too much. Girl 1: Yeah, probably.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a screaming goat

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How did the girl cross the road? -She didn't, she died because she was blind and didn't see the "don't walk" sign.

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whats orange and cant talk? an orange

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What Did The Ocean Say To The Other Ocean? What? Nothing, They Just Waved. Oh. Did You Sea What I Did There? No. I'm Shore You Did.

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What do you call three Asian people eating a cat? A tragic last resort for a starving family.

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You know what sucks? A vacuum.

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How many black people does it take to solve a complex physics equation? Trick question

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What kind of dance does an alien do? None, aliens aren't real.

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A horse walks into a bar and Shits John Taffer is Pissed

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If a banana is a vegetable, how come your mother gets confused when I stick pretzels in my butthole?

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A hasidic Rabbi and a member of Hezbollah enter a bar in a Jewish settlement. (No, of course they didn't.)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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