A black man walks out of a police station

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If you spill milk Don't cry over it..... Clean it up.

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who can be more evil than the person who hit my nuts. Adolf Hitler.

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why did rosa parks get moved to the back of the bus? she didnt call shotgun

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Were do seamen live under the sea? A submarine!

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Never again, I have all the intel I need on you, you cost me a fucking eye, you think I would let go of that so easily? It hurts day and night, I have not slept in days, my fucking eyelid is torn right off, and while I use a fucking excuse for an eyepatch, I still have not gotten used to sleep without being able to shut both my eyes, I have a constant fever, you miss me, you are directly responsible for scaring my wife and fucking over my face. Deal with it, cry harder asshole. Moral: You step on my foot, I break off yours, you cost me an eye, you do not know whats waiting in line for you, I am going to make you beg me to let you die! Did you think I would warm up as quickly to something as irresponsible as you? And we do not know yet if you did this on purpose, we do not even live in the same fucking country, and I get assholes assaulting me again! What the hell have you done? If my wife had been here I would have been dead! Moral: I hope you got pets, I will skin them alive in front of your face!

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Ask me if I'm a tree Are you a tree? No

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Your dad must be a drug dealer because I saw him in your kitchen snorting cocaine

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Your momma's so fat, she died on the operating table during her bypass surgery.

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How many babies does it take to cover a roof? Depends on how thinly you slice them.

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Why did Lucy fall off the swing? She had no arms and legs Knock knock Who's there? Not Lucy

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What happened to Kanye West when he interrupted a KKK ritual meeting? He was promptly hung from a tree for being a negro.

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is it normal to be sexualy atracted to numbers?

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Knock Knock Who's there? Banana Oh good I thought you wouldn't make it.

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Why was the mohel touching the little boy's penis? Because that's his job!

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Knock knock. Who's there? The IRS, please get out of the way.

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that awkward moment when there is no candy in the van.....

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What do you call a hamburger with nothing inside of it? A virgin.

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Why did the girl scream at old people? She had turrets. www.youtube.com/LouisGames www.twitch.tv/KiLM_Ghostz

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What do you call a woman with two black eyes? Irish sunglasses

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what dyu call a bunch of white guys on a bench? the NBA

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What happens when you put a baby in the microwave? I don't know, cause I was to busy jerking off.

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Your momma is so fat, she should be concerned about her increased risk if a heart attack because of her poor eating habits.

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Chuck Norris got his ass kicked. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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