Knock, Knock. Who's there? Dave. Dave who? Dave proceeds to break into tears as his grandmother's Alzheimers has progressed to the point where she can no longer remember him.

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Whats worse than a dumpster full of dead babies? A landfill full of dead babies.

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Why was the wife disappointed in her husband? He hasn't been very talkative since the suicide.

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What did the fat man say to everyone? Hey everyone! I am i fat man!

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How do you make a blond cry? You punch her in the face.

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johnny goes to the shops asks the lady at the counter, can i go home The Lady says ..... Buy one get one free

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How do you stop a bus? You try to wave down the bus driver, they're usually nice people who will stop for you if you put in some effort and act appreciative.

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What do you call a black woman that's blind and has 1 leg? Handicapped

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We're both lawyers.

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A leper sees that a woman has dropped a bag of groceries on the sidewalk. "Hey ma'am, can I give you a HAND?" asks the leper. "No thank you, sir. I can manage." replies the woman. "That's a relief," laughs the leper, shyly. "I am quite weak due to leprocy."

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Why did the bear turn red? Because I fucking stabbed it!

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A Priest and a Rabbi walk into a bar together. They discuss the fundamentals and aspects of Religion.

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hi little boy you want some candy i dont know do you want some candy you creeper

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What's better than winning a million dollars? Winning 2 million dollars!

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Q: Why was the boy sad? A: An Elephant was sitting on his face

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ah-ah. the proper response to an anti joke.

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Why was the pizza mad? Because he was going thorough a growth spurt and the testosterone got to him.

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Why don't women drive more? Because statistically the man offers to drive more frequently

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John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt has a really long name.

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A man and wife were having a vacation when suddenly the man falls to the floor and starts having a seizure. The woman screams "Oh my God, is there a doctor in the house?!" Then a doctor appears and helps the man with the appropriate method of handling a seizure. The doctor says everything is going to be okay.

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Nock Nock Whose there? Your mom. Stop locking your door.

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Q: Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants? A: Because he had bladder control problems and feared he may ruin the first pair.

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they say a rolling stone gathers... speed until it reaches maximum potential speed and cannot go any faster.

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the other day i was walking down the street and saw a black man carrying a tv. i thought to myself, "hey that looks like mine!" but then i was like nawwwwwww, mine's at home...... shining my shoes -_-

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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