What did the orphan get for Christmas? Cancer.

A man walks into a bar. He drinks heavily and dies of alcohol poisoning.

Once upon a time a was born

In the middle of english class, Little Timmy raised his hand and asked "Can I use the restroom" The english teacher said " I don't know, CAN you?" Little Timmy said "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?

Q- if a small quiz is a quizicle then whats a small test A- a testicle

Do you know what a zombie smells like? Death

did you hear about the guy who got his left leg and left arm cut off? he's all right now

What's funny about a small child with no arms, no legs? Nothing.. Nothing at all.

Why did the vulture cross the road? To get to the pile of dead babies left over from the Holocaust.

A woman walked into a college.....which wasn't suprising because she never learned to read

What magical power enables Spongebob to talk? There is no magical power. he is a cartoon therefore making him be able to anything in anyone's wild dreams.

Two fish we're in a tank.. Yup.

How many cops does it take to change a light bulb? None. They just beat it for being black.

Why did the little boy stop looking for his ball? Because he found it.

Jake pulled out a gun and held it to his head, planning to fool his friends because he knew the gun was empty. Then his friend thought he was helping out his suicidal friend by stabbing him.

Where was Suzy during the explosion? Everywhere! Knock Knock! Who's there? Not Suzy!

CAOIMHIN JUST BE QUITE

I painted my dog to look like pizza. Someone ate him. It was my mom.

How did the corpse cross the road? They can't cross the road they're dead.

Why can't the black guy read? Because he's blind.

whats worse than 2 jews 3 jews

How many black men does it take to change a light bulb? TO GET TO THE OTHER SIDE!

What do you call a Black man with a gun ?? A black man with a gun !

Why was the man lying under a sheet. Because he was dead.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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