Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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What animal was two legs and bleeds a lot? half a dog

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what do you say to your girlfriend just after the best sex you ever had? I really got great value for money tonight with my prostitute sweety. You should have been there

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what do you get when you have an albino black man, a lesbian middle eastern siamese twin of the female gender, a polygamist indian and a jewish native american? A very cultured and diversified posse of hostages. Take your pick.

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Why was the baby so hot? Napalm. Why was the baby so cold? Meat locker.

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How do you take money from a Mexican? You don't because they have none.

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Q: How many babies does it take to paint a wall? A:I don't know i was asking you P.S. leave your answer in the comments below :D

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knock knock whos there. no one your hullicinating, heroine is hell of a drug

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knock knock who's there Bob I don't know you Bob and if you don't get off my porch this minute i'm calling the authorities.

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Wayne Rooney's face and intelligence.

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Why was Billy's grandma not around for Thanksgiving? Because she's dead

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Why didn't little jimmy take out the trash? He is a rock

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What did the lady say to the boy who's parents just died? Haha, your parents just died.

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Whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and a pile of shit. I don't have a pile of shit in my garage.

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Roses are Black, Violets are Black, I am Ray Charles

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What did the rabbit say to the man nothing animals cant talk

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What does a boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

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What's worst than being stung by a bee? being stung by two bees. what's worst than that? The Holocaust. What's worst than that? being stung by three bees.

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Why are ginger's jokes not funny? Because they're gingers.

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What do you call a orange BAD GRAMMER

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Whats long and hard? a baseball bat

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How did the chicken cross the road?he just got up and walked to the other side.

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Why did the Chicken cross the road? Since when is it any of your business? Cant we live in a world where chickens can cross the road freely without having there motives questioned?

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Why does the rabbit go in the hole? because that's where it lives.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops