Your mama's so fat that when she farted, gas came out!

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I walk up in the morning feeling like pdidy who's pdidy grab my glasses out the door I have no glasses girl going to hit the city how do I hit the city ugh this confersasion is over song hmmff

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Your mamas so fat that she went to the doctor and he said she has a very high case of diabetes so now she's trying to excerise more and watching what she eats.

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Stephen Hawkings may know everything about the universe, but try to get him to tie his shoes.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Systemic oppression.

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You know whats funny about 9/11? Nothing.

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Why did the mailman say hi to you? He was trying to be friendly

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What is green and red and is going super fast? A frog in a blender.

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Whats the difference between a monkey and a baby? Eating a baby tastes better with saltines.

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What do you get when you pull down your pants in public? Most likely a criminal record for indecent exposure.

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Who is the fastest kid in AA? Alex Solomos

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what is my catphrase nothing I am too good to have one

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Tifa my ass, if that is your name buddy, then I am Nicholas Cage, or why do you not just call me Cloud Strife? Seriously, if you are a guy just say it and get lost, I will still honor my agreement and show up and see what I can do for your little order though, you pay the trip and the stay of course.

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23 convicts were showering. One of them dropping his soap bar. The person next to him picked it up, and the one who dropped it said thanks.

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What do a boat and a computer have in common? Nothing

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A Chinese, American, and German were all on the a boat sinking off the Border of the U.S. So the American called the U.S Coast Guard and they were rescued and taken to a nearby hospital. Two of the three members are still alive today and haunted by the memory of that day.

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knock knock. who's there? 9/11

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A child walks into a bar. I swear those jungle gyms are too short.

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did you hear about the mexican that went to college? yes

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Why did a jew die? It got killed by a nazi.

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What's the sound of one hand clapping? The same as two hands; just not as loud.

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Why didn't the black kid get anything for Christmas? His family was Jewish.

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Roses are black Violets are black A black person died

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Whats slower than molasses? A dead baby.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops