Roses are red violets are blue I'm gonna rape you with a stick

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Bob: I have a funny knock knock joke, but you have to start it. Joe: Ok. Knock Knock. Bob: Who's there? Joe: Uhhhhhhh Bob: Exactly.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Can you get me a stapler,but make sure it has staples or else I won't be able to staple anything

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Where does a one-legged waitress work? Wherever she can get good health insurance.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

How did the Muslim pilot die? He had a fatal heart attack while flying over the Atlantic and as a result the 300 passengers died by drowning.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's faster, a train or a bike? A horse because a cow gives milk

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Text this number just cuz 16305208722

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Your mother is so large she finds it difficult to fit into regular sized clothing

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What do you call a spaceman on Mars? Confused, because with the current technology it is impossible to send a human into space and onto Mars.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What do the world and jelly beans have in common? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's worse than finding ants in your kitchen? A truckload of dead babies.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why doesn't my mom make dinner anymore? she died in a fire on my birthday.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Whats funnier than a dead baby? a dead baby in a clown costume!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Whats worse than a mother of 3 children, jumping off a bridge, smashing into the metal roof of a large car and dieing on impact? A mother of 3 children jumping off a bridge, smashes into the metal roof of a large car, survives,, becomes paralyzed, and has to explain to her children, why she is in a wheel chair for the rest of her life.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's worse than a teacher yelling at you? The holocaust

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What is the answer to life, universe and everything? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Jimmy's mom: Jimmy go do your chores now!! Jimmy: You shut your mouth, whore. Get your smelly ass back in the kitchen!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What do you call a Pakistani flying a plane. 9/11

thumb_up thumb_down +8

AARgh my name is AWsaing the nawant of the where of amzai Giant rabbit bunny

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Knock Knock Who's there? Me ill kill u,

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What are crabs with out the crabs Nothing hahahahaha

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A white man applies for a job two weeks later he finds out he lost the job to a hardworking Mexican who went to college and payed his debts

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What do a turtle an a bird have in common? They both fly except the turtle

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A brunette, a redhead, and a blonde go on vacation in Hawaii. They plan to swim to the next island. The brunette and redhead do it with no problem. The blonde swims halfway and realizes she is tired. She continues to swim straight ahead knowing her friends are already at the next island.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops