What's green and has wheels? The White House. I lied about everything, I'm so sorry.

Montague goes to the alcoholics meeting and says "Hello I'm Montague and I am an alcoholic" Evreyone points at him and chants "LOSER!, LOSER!, LOSER!, LOSER!" Montague is appaled, he expected to be welcomed with sympathy and respect. Then he realises his mistake. He has walked into meeting with a bottle of whisky and is wearing a Justin Beiber T Shirt

Why did the man visit 4chan? He heard about it from a coworker and was curious about what it was.

What's worse than a dead baby? A dumpster full of dead babies What's worse than that? One is still alive at the bottom What's worse than that? It had to eat its way out. What's worse than that? It came back for seconds

What's stupid a light bulb.

19 cats 33 hamsters 24 turtles and 23 dogs are all in a small cage, PETA is not happy.

Who is a pussy? Jeff Misner

What do you get when you cross a hamster with a zebra? A genetic abomination that you should put out of it's misery.

Your mother is so fat that she is considered morbidly obese. In fact, she should seriously consider a weight loss diet to reduce her risk of heart disease and diabetes.

Wanna hear a joke? Zeke friends Wanna hear a better jokes? Zeke with his friends

Why was the black guy sitting in the back of the bus? Because there were no more seats available in the front.

Knock, Knock Who's there? Bill Bill who? Bill your neighbor. Can I have some flour?

Knock, Knock Who's there It's me open up the D#### door it's me open up the D#### door, who? just open the door this is not a fricken knock knock joke.

Why were 5 tall white guys sitting on a bench? They were in the NBA

Why isn;t the square root of peanut butter very athletic?.Actually, peanut butter isn't a mathematical equation nor does it have the necessary chemical make-up, physical properties or the biological construct that is required for it to be able to be considered athletic, stupid. You now have a inoperable tumor at the base of your spine. And I fucked your dad and shat in his mouth. Also, the cure for leukemia is my diarrhoea, you faggot.

Q: what's worse than getting the flu? A: getting cancer

Q: why did the little boy fall off the swing? A: He had no arms Q: Why couldn't he get up? A: He died when he hit the ground

What do you call a black man with no job? Unemployed

Two guys fight over a girl. The girl gets up from under them.

Why did the toilet paper roll down the hill? ... To get to the bottom.

Your moms so fat she struggles to to everyday tasks

WILLYS

What is the difference between Sarah Jessica Parker and a horse? Sarah Jessica Parker is a human being who is also a very skilled actress A horse is a animal which is usualy kept in a barn

What was so incredible about this bigger new oven i just bought? It could fit twice as many Jews in it. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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