What did the day say to his son when he came out of the closet? Its alright

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What is the difference between a fridge? I'm sorry, I have a severe mental disability and telling jokes is not... F'tang F'tang Zoop Pong Wii!

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Why did the girl fall off of the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

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Come on children, don't dawdle.

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Why can't Jade Goody go swimming? Because she's dead.

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Why was Jimmy sad? Because he was about to be shot for attempting to assassinate the president.

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Whats the difference of how a hot blonde and an ugly red head got in to the same collage with a sex addicted dean? Nothing they were both very smart inteligent women with respectables GPA

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had down-syndrome

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School is like a boner. It is long and hard unless your asian.

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A man walked into a doctors and said, “Doctor help! My arms have stopped working” to which the receptionist replied, “I’m not the doctor and you need to make an appointment.”

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Why did little tommy fall in the well. Because he grew tired of his life of brutal Beatings and starvation, so he jumped.

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What is the best way to burn Jews Light them on fire

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Is the glass half full or half empty? The liquid in the glass is not at exact half, so that question is not answerable.

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What time is it when you run out of ice cream? Time to get more ice cream.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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How do you make someone sad? Tell them they have cancer

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Why did the princess kiss the frog? She really wanted a wart.

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A muslim gets on an airplane and takes his seat. The plane lands safely and he enjoys his vacation in Florida.

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Whats black and hangs from trees? To get to the other side.

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. One asks the other "Isn't it hot in here?" To which the other replies, "Holy ****, a talking muffin!"

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"Where's your mom?' "She died last night. . ."

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What's red, green and smells like crap? Green and red crap.

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What do you call an asian pilot? A pilot you racist bastard

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The Yak, a long-coated bovine found in the Himalayas, is named for its distinct call, which sounds similar to "yak-yak-yakyak".

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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