roses are red, violets are blue, hes for me not for you, if by chance you take me place, ill take my fist, and smarsh your face.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a bagel.

Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Because it was struck by lightning and died.

A baby seal walks into a club. I happens to be that the club is having their bi-annual PETA meeting, and the baby seal is chosen as the organization's new mascot. After touring the nation and meeting important world leaders, the baby seal still wonders why there was a club at the North Pole.

I never made a mistake. I thought i did once but i was mistaken

What do you call a small chinese person? They prefer the term little person to the term midget.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Why can't a chicken cross a road without it being questioned?

Roses are red, violets blue, um... that's all i got.

A life-sized cardboard cut out of Justin Bieber was in a contest with a cut out of Liam Neeson. It was stiff competition.

Your mother sleeps around so much that I worry that she may be taking too much medicine for her insomnia.

Why did the world end? Because of Jim Layhey's whispering winds of shit.

You can lead a fool to wisdom, but you can't make him think.

so your paddling up stream in a cement canoe, one wheel falls off. how many pancakes does it take to shingle a dog house? 46 cause bears dont like eggs.

all these jokes are horrible now

If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.

quantum physics?

What happens when you go swimming in the rain? You get wet.

why couldn't the girl watch t.v? Because her house burned down

I like that, yet I wonder if our subconscious knows what it is what we seek, maybe we need to tell ourselves that we will find happiness, and then the mind leads us there.

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

Yo dawg, I heard you like cars. Thats cool, whats your favorite one?

Who has a higher pitched voice than the average man? A woman.

welcome to anti joke.com. you were expecting an anti joke wernt you.

A good antijoke? Going to the last few pages of the "Popular" antijoke section....

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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