What did the man do when his truck was stolen? He contacted the police, who immediately began searching for the culprit. He then contacted his car insurance company and was soon compensated for the full value of his truck. One day the man was in his new truck listening to the local news and heard that the thief was found and convicted of Grand Theft Auto; his name was Martin Kaiser.

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Why did single women didn't want any babies for? because of Ice Ice Baby.

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A man calls his 23 year old nephew on a Saturday night. He's calling him, in order to apologise for molesting him when he was younger. As he could no longer live with the guilt and shame. They both start to cry on the phone. The nephew hangs up " I can't do this.." The man receives an email from his boss, saying " Lisa told me she's still waiting for your analysis on the new federal cuts and how they're going to affect us. Please send them asap."

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Why couldn't the woman give her sister a present? Because she just got eaten by zombies.

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Why didn't the black kid get anything for Christmas? His family was Jewish.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I'm really drunk so show me your tits.

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Your mom's so fat that when she stepped on the scale at the doctors office the doctor said " hey i wanted your weight not your phone number"

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Why was 6 afraid of 7 ? Cuz he was black.

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Yo Momma is Like a Prostitute... ...I pay her for sexual intecourse

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Your Mom

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Nick Demarco got butt due to the high number of females in his apartment

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What is black and hangs on a rope next to a rebel flag in my back yard? A tire swing for my redneck kids to swing on.

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How many Jews can you fit into a Volkswagen Beatle? Two in the front, two in the back, and one hundred in the ash tray.

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Two blondes walks into a tavern, which is kind of funny, since the second one should have seen it.

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What's the difference between a piano and a fish? A piano is an instrument, fish is an animal

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A: Can I get a tall white Russian. B: No. A: Why not? B: Because this is a Barnes and Nobles. However, we do have a Starbucks, and I can offer you a venti caramel iced coffee"

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q. why did the guy forget what he did at the paty last night? a. because he had short term memory loss

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What was the last thing to go through Kurt Cobain's mind? His teeth.

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I once met a giraffe, It needed a bath, When I turned on the water, It started to swim, Because it was actually a fish.

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Insert joke that isn't even an anti joke = The new jokes on anti joke now.

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Which is worse, 9/11 or the holocaust? Biting into an apple and finding a worm.

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Why did the black man eat KFC? Because he got hungry.

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What happens when you put a baby in the microwave? I don't know, cause I was to busy jerking off.

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How do you get rid of black people in your back yard? Politely ask them to leave.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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