How did the guy survive the plane crash? He didnt, He died like everybody else.

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Is it considered sexual harassment if a midget says to a woman, "your hair smells nice"? Holy crap i don't like black people.

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Do you know what killed the cat? Feline AIDS

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A dog is always in the pushup position.

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Santa and a smart blonde jump of a cliff. Who gets to the ground first? Neither, they don't exist.

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Why wasn't the white guy voted for president? He had down syndrome

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What is black and white, and red all over? I don't know that's why I was asking.

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What did the cannibal eat for Christmas. Your Mom!

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What did the coconut say to the lizard? Nothing, the coconut fell off the tree and killed the lizard.

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Q: What did the giraffe say to the sunflower? A: I like your shoelaces!

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Where do babies come from? You fathers penis.

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What do you call a spoiled black daughter? Tiana (Disney Princess)

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Why do all asians all look alike? Because they do.

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Is it a bird, Is it a plane, I don't know what it is but it's heading straight for the World Trade Centre

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Your mama so fat That she suffers from heart disease

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How do you make a nerd cry? Give him a 99% on a test.

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What's the best part about having sex with a bunch of 3 year olds? There's 20 of them

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Why did the snappy dresser take a button off of a coat? To see a button fly! NO YOU IDIOT YOU DID IT WRONG, IT'S SUPPOSED TO ABOUT ABOUT A "BUTTER FLY" OMG YOU DOLT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Jerry: Hi what's your name? Bob: My name is bob. Jerry: Bob, nice to meet you, my name is Jerry. Bob: Nice to meet you Jerry.

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A guy walks into a bar with a parrot on his shoulder. The bartender says, "whered you get the pig?" The guy says, "It's not a pig its a parrot." The bartender says, "i was talking to the parrot."

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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What do you get when you cross the motorway with a lottery ticket? You get knocked down and killed.

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I supported my sisters decision to get an abortion. Still would have been cool to be a dad :/

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A brunette, a redhead, and a blond are all stuck on an island 100 miles away from the nearest civilization with no resources. After 2 weeks, they decide that no one is going to save them and they have to swim for it. The brunette swims 25 miles and then gets eaten by sharks. The redhead swims 75 miles and then drowns. The blond swims 99 miles but got tired, so she swam back.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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