- Anti Joke

Q. Why did the lady scream when she saw her husband? A. Because he was dead.

What did the elf say to Santa I'm not making any more toys fat ass.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, most chickens are held on farms, but those that do roam free are afraid of automobiles so therefore they wouldn't go near a road at all. But if the chicken was located in a deserted town there would be no traffic, so then it would be able to cross freely over any road there and not get injured or mortally wounded.

What comes after Friday? A ?.

Why did the middle age man walk across the street? There were no vehicles currently driving on that particular road

Why did nobody answer when billy knocked on the door? Billy was a loaf of bread.

What's the difference between celery and a truck?

Q: A vandal walked into a bar. What did the bartender say? A: Nothing, the vandal had covered him and the bar in pritt stick before he had the opportunity to speak, then left with his penguin accomplice, Reginald the third.

Q: Hey, ask me if I'm a tree. ".. Are you a tree?" A: No.

Why did the chicken cross the road? What does chicken mean?

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What do you call a man with an arrow to the knee? An ambulance because he's got a serious leg injury right there.

A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

What do gamers call an abortion on quintuplets? PENTAKILL!!!

How do you make a clown stop laughing? Hit him in the face with an ax.

How did the black kid get in school? By taking the bus.

What did the boy say to the elders at the senior center? Dayum, you're all ugly!

Michael Jackson walks into a bar No he doesn't. He's dead.

What did the man do when he ran out of milk? He went to the store to get some more milk!

What is white and re(a)d all over? White paper that is dyed red.

Why did the boy chuck a fridge at the other boy? Because he broke his toy train.

Why did Johnny throw the clock out the window? His parents are never around to supervise him.

What's blue and smells? A dead girl guide.

what do the students call their red-headed friend? Mike.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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