Knock knock. Who's there? Auntie.

What one thing do the five members of Mystery Inc have in common? They were all raped and killed by REAL MONSTERS! One of the monsters happened to be Chuck Norris. He's a BEAST!

THAT'S RIGHT, BEST INVISIBLE PAINT I EVER BOUGHT. LOOK WHAT A GREAT JOB IT DID ON THIS PAGE YEAH! I RECKON IT IS THE BEST INVISIBLE PAINT I EVER DIDN'T SEE

How do you kill a cripple? You bite its fucking face off

http://cache.deadspin.com/assets/resources/2008/04/Deer_mating2.jpg

Why did the muslim cross the road? To blow up a train

Q: What do you call Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen. A: two things: Their names, and a doctor because they are both in need of a nutritionist.

Why did the man pee his pants? Because he was paralyzed from the waist down and had no way of feeling

how did the fat man get up the stairs he walked

what do you call a black guy with a nice car? most probably a rapper or professional athlete, however there is also a great chance that he is a doctor of philosophy and well educated.

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

Why did the man leave anti-joke.com? Because he realized that it was time for dinner and the ham was burning.

how many licks does it take to get to the center of lollipop? unknown.

LO LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOPLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOO O O O O O O OLO LOL OL O LO LO LO L OL -LOL GUY

my grandpa told me "dont let fear rule your life" 2 hours later he got hit by a train.

A man walks into a bar. He hits his head and dies.

Why did the plane leave late? Because they were out of Kellogg's® Breakfast Cereal.

If you go to a restaurant and you have more food on your plate then someone who is obese, you KNOW you have too much food.

A man takes a bite into a tuna casserole and burns his tounge. He is also a hermaphradite.

Knock knock. *Silence Knock knock *silence Knock knock *Silence KNOCK KNOCK. *Silence (Busts open door) Oh right I murdered Billy a week ago

I was there when Lebron James hit a home run to win the Super Bowl.

Grandma used to say "you only die once." Years later, I learned the wisdom behind those words.

What is black white and red all over? A zebra which a lion did not finish eating.

were at work systems r down

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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