why did the little boy start to cry? because his parents didn't love him

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an ethopian thanksgiving

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Q: How do you stop a black man from drowning? A: Quit peeing in his mouth.

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Friends are just like trees. They fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe.

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What's big long, harry, and has glowing eyes? I dont know. Its under my bed. PLEASE SEND HELP!!!

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why did benny go to the 4th grade school nurse? he had a massive erection.

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What do you call a woman when you're inside her? Mom.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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Q-What happens when you grow tomatoes in Kansas on an odd number year when its an average of 398degrees Kelvin ? A-You eat em

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Hey I just met you, And this is crazy, I've got dementia, Hey I just met you.

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A witch walks into a bar and orders a drink. She gets her drink and proceeds to have a great time.

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Women are only good for seventy-one things: Love A proper home to come home to everyday 69

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All the kids at school we're playing soccer on a sunny day except Jenny, because she had a headache and didn't come to school that day

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Why was blueberry flavoured bubblegum cancelled? Because it tasted like soup.

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* two sisters are making yo mama jokes* * mom turns around* mom: Hey yo mama so stupid ... sister one: ummmm.... sister two: sure thats not you?

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Whats brown and rhymes with Snoop? Dr. Dre

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What do an onion and a hamster have in common? They are both in my Grandma's omelette.

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A black man walks into a bar holding a weapon. He is asked to leave to leave because weapons are not allowed in the bar.

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the man walk in to the shop and brought a pet nothing

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Why did the jew ask for $10 back after he lent a boy $2? Because of inflation

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A father and his son get into an accident and are whisked away to the hospital. The father dies, and the son is brought into surgery. The doctor is rushed in, but looks at the boy and says "I can operate on this boy, his my son." How is this possible? The boy's father was a zombie.

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There once was a plain Cheerio. He has a decent life with a low paying job and an apartment. One day, he decided to make his life more fun and started going to parties. He met some women and had a good time. He was happier and was soon promoted at work. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself, only to discover that he was now a Honey-nut Cheerio. He continued to go to parties and met a girl that eventually became his girlfriend. He became a manager at work and moved into an expensive condo. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself and was a Frosted Cheerio. He then quit his job and opened a club, where he became the most popular Cheerio in town. All guys wanted to be him, girls with him. At one party, his girlfriend asked him for some punch. He went to the kitchen but couldn't find any. There was no punch-line.

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patty was in sunday school, the teacher asked her "patty who created the universe?" john sliped into the seat next to her and jabbed her with a pen "LORD ALMIGHTY" the teacher said' good patty now who gave himself for us? john again jabbed her with a pin "JESUS CHRIST" "that very good patty now what did mary say to joseph after they had their 23 child?" john jabbed her " IF YOU STICK THAT DAMN THING IN ME ONE MORE TIME ILL BREAK IT IN HALF!!!" the teacher fainted

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A frog hops into a bar. The bartender asks "What can I get you to drink?". The frog hops out and the bartender realizes he is talking to animals because he has anxiety issues and all of his friends leave him and he spends every night crying and waiting to be loved...so he shoots himself.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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