do you know what Noah didn't bring on his arc? unicorns

a black man walks into a shop, he buys his groceries, then leaves...

Your mother is so fat that she has to undergo amputation of her foot because of type 2 diabetes.

the WNBA.

2 muffins were in the oven when one turned to the other and said. "Damn it's hot in here" The second muffin looked at him with a shocked expression and exclaims "She's burning the potatoes!"

An old man walks into a bar. He drinks 3 beers and dies. The bartender calls paramedics but when the police came they arrested the bartender for beating his wife. A few hours later an earthquake destroys the bar and everyone was evacuated and many were injured. The manager was driving to the scene but has a car accident with the ambulance. It was such a bad day.

Hey, in case you are around and still wonder how he got out. Anonymous tip from yours truly, if he had remained there, you would all have taken the blame. Just stay away from the deep web, and I wont be forced to come get all of you as well. For a long while I was suspicious that you might have been leaking information regarding me and all of us, but then the rules changed and information regarding Point Zero, subtle hints and such, began spreading, it has been removed, nobody will know what Intel was sold, so yeah, he was a mole, he is no more, for this I am sorry.

What starts with a J, and burned in the oven? My Jumbalaya, i left it in for too long...

Why was the boy sad? Because his pet bird couldn't fly. Why couldn't the bird fly? Because it was dead.

When life gives you lemons You've got some lemons.

what do you call a redneck virgin? a seven year old that can run faster than her brothers.

Knock knock. ... Knock knock. ... Knock knock. ... The FedEx man leaves, realizing that no one was home, and continues on with his job.

My life has been getting worse and worse since I developed cancer.

Why did the little boy let go of his balloon? Because I was raping his face.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, You just died, and I'm laughing at you and your extremely ugly face.

A man goes to his doctor and says, "Help me, my wife thinks she's a chicken." The doctor recommends a nearby psychiatrist to analyze the wife's mental instability, and inevitably she is housed in an insane asylum. The husband commits suicide.

meatspin.fr

When birds fly south for the winter they fly in a V formation. one side is always longer than the other. why is that? Because there are more birds on that side

Why did the Chicken cross the roead? It didn't

What do you call a school bus full of black people? A school bus

Person 1: What do you get when you cross a cow and your mom? Person 2: What? Person 1: A cow that looks like your mom

What do you call a Mexican guy in America? A Mexican American

What's the difference between and orange? The horse wasn't wearing a saddle.

What do you call a black person who flies a plane? A pilot!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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