Why couldn't little sally swim? Because she had weights on her ankles.

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What is a pedophile's favorite thing about twenty-six year olds? There are 20 of them.

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What day is it today? Today. Thank you. You're welcome.

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a fat man walks out of mcdonalds

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Why did the boy fall off of the swing? Because he had no arms

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yo mama just like a toilet, white and full of crap!

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A man realizes the whole time he has wanted to fly like a bird. His funeral was two weeks later

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Kid: My dad's brother has gone at it with a lot of women. Friend(sarcastically): Geez that's great! When was he born? Kid: '69

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What did the man with no head say to the women?

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Why are there only 50 states in the U.S.A The US gives territories a chance to vote if they want to be states in the US.

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James walks into a room he then leaves as the room is full of hot women but he does not find them attractive as he has a girlfriend and is also bisexual.

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Knock knock Who's there? Dave, I've got a fucking gun. Let me the fuck in.

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What did the boy with no legs get for Christmas? Dance Dance Revolution

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what do you call a dumb blonde with no arms? Her name because she will not respond to anything else

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A man came home one day, drunk and feeling horny. He proceeded to the bedroom where he found his wife just getting into bed in a lace bra and sexy underwear. This turned him on even more so he cuddled up to her and whispered seductivly in her ear before kissing her neck. His wife was not in the mood for sex so she shot him

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A black man and a white man were on an island. They lived in England.

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What is blue and has blue shoes? A blue shoe box

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Why did the monkey eat the banana? Because it was sexually confused

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A horse walks into a bar and the bar asks "Why the long face?". The horse replies " I am deeply troubled by the anthropomorphic aspects of my existence and the extent to which I am now protected by law."

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What's worse than being short? Being a Tutsi in 1994.

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What's the difference between an apple and a banana? One's an apple.

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A man wakes up in his bed and looks at the clock. He realises he is gonna be late for work. He quickly gets out of bed, into the bathroom, has a shower, puts his deodorant on and brushes his teeth, gets dressed, and goes in his car. He drives out of his garage and drives to his work but gets stuck in traffic. He then gets to the car park of his work and parks his car. He gets out, goes up the elevator to his floor, when the elevator door opens to his floor, he quickly says hello to Terrance and goes to his bosses office. And guess what the boss says? You're late.

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Joe: Hey, why are your counters all red and your blender looks broken? Me: The same reason why Mrs. Johnson's baby is missing. ajl

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What do apples and black men both have in common? They are both people except for the apple

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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