knock knock Goodbye

Why didnt Jimmy go to school on Thursday? Jimmy is a vegetarian!

What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? A waste of time because they just be playing soccer

Texter 1: Hey, do you want to hang out? Texter 2: Sorry dude, i lost my phone, i'm trying to find it Texter 1: Ok, text me when you find it Texter 2: OK

Why did the Mexican man grow a mustache? It wasn't his choice. Men naturally grow facial hair and he ran out of razors.

What's the difference between a statue and a real human? The statue can't run if the birds shit on it.

What did the hobo get for christmas? Nothing.

A homeless guy walked up to me and said "Any change?", to which I replied, "Nope, your still homeless". We laughed and laughed. The he stabbed me.

A man gets a new job working for his boss. Later, he beats his boss in a fight, quits his job, and starts his own business. Historians later concluded that the man's life would serve as a perfect national allegory for the USA.

Q: How many Jewish people can fit in a four door sedan? A: 4, or possibly 5, depending on the sedan's optional seating, and depending on whether the gentleman are comfortable enough with each other to scoot closer to allow a 5th friend to join in.

Bob: I have a funny knock knock joke, but you have to start it. Joe: Ok. Knock Knock. Bob: Who's there? Joe: Uhhhhhhh Bob: Exactly.

Why did the fridge fall off its bike? Because someone threw a little girl at it.

Roses are red, violets are blue, I'm using my hand but thinking of you.

What's worse than being dead? Nothing.

The boy gets shot in the face, he then dies of childhood obesity.

Your mom is so old she died

What are the biggest ants in the world? Ants under a magnifying glass.

An Jewish man worked at a bank, and ate chicken noodles for lunch and then stabbed and man playing the saxophone.

Why did the black man get arrested? He didn't pay child support for his 12 bastard children

Why did the bald man go to hospital? Because we was getting chemotherapy

Two men fought over a bag of peanuts. The peanuts won.

how do you make a baby cry? put a nail through its foot

Why do Jews fast for Yom Kippur? It's part of their tradition.

How many kids with ADD does it take to screw in a lightbulb Wanna go ride bikes?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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