Where does Mario go after you finish the game? Drug rehab.

What's just not right? Left

How can you tell the difference between a cow? One says moo

What did the doctor say to his patient? You have AIDS.

Why was lil' Susie screaming horrifically? Nobody knows. That's why the neighbors called the cops. -Harrison

Where did the paralytic go for a vacation? No where he can't move.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have cancer Nutella on muffin

Why did the woman stop making a sandwich for her husband? Because he's dead.

why did the squrill leave his home an ax-man cut it down

so a man walks into a bar...... He has a couple laughs over some drinks then went home.

Why did the piano explode? Beacause someone planted an explosive inside of it.

Fill in the blank: A ______ is a man's best friend. Jake: Is it dog? Host: YES! Now for the 1 million dollars! Finish the sentence: I just saved a lot of money by Jake: Switching to Geico? Host: Sorry, that's incorrect. The correct answer is "I just saved a lot of money by not spending it on useless junk and by budgeting my account towards investing in the future." Oh well, nice try.

A fireman walks into a bar. Everyone has burned alive already, and he's too late to save them.

Burrinbar Smells like incest anal sex!

A guy wanted to write a joke. He didn't.

What's the best example of an anti-joke? This one.

A man walks into a bar. Oh, wait, no. It was a horse. So... A man walks into a horse

What's red and bad for your teeth A brick

Q: What do you call 10 babies at the bottom of the ocean? A: Dead

what do you get when you cross an ant with toni? ANTONI

What did Mary say to Vishnikharmut? You're name is weird. What did Vishnikharmut say to Mary? Your grammar is incorrect.

Whats worst than reading the 8th anti joke that ends with the Holocaust? The one where it ends with someone getting hit by a fridge for the 9th time.

Q. What do you call a man with a shovel in his head? A. An ambulance due to the fact that he has a rather serious head wound.

A man was about to be assassinated. The assassin said "do you have any last wishes? The man said he wished that a meteor would fly down and kill the assassin. A meteor actually did come down but that was predicted years back. The meteor fell on the assassin and killed him, the man, and any living thing aboveground on Earth.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...