You know what's good for shoulder pain? If you ice on for 20 minutes then off for 20 minutes repetitively three times a day

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Q: What did little Timmy get from his mother this Christmas? A: The contents of her will.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

How do you tell if your lesbian lover has cheated on you? If she's pregnant.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a wanted serial killer on the run from the police

thumb_up thumb_down -21

A deaf man walks into a bar. A few minutes later, cops come in and takes the poor man into the cop car and takes him downtown to the precinct for booking. Meanwhile, back in the bar the deaf man drinks his beer and converses with the bartender in sign language.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What is the difference between a person with Alzheimer's and Aids? 24!

thumb_up thumb_down -21

women's rights.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Relax, close down the place, he wont get very far. The rest of you better stay inside, and I promise you will all remain safe and secure.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

why did the man stay home on a monday? He was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Knock Knock Who's there? Jehovah's witness Damn...

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Q : Who is the most famous celebrity, Lady Gaga or Justin Bieber? A : Neither, because they are just fads.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

There once was a boy walking over a railroad track. He got hit by a train. He died.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

why did the kid get in trouble. Because he put this up in typing class -charles hall aka chuckles

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why did the cave men discover fire? They were the only humans on earth.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

A child finally stood up to the school bullies! Recently the news did a story about a school shooting.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he had heard this joke so many times that it drove him so mad that he grabbed an ice cream, stepped into the road, and was hit by a bus, purposely adding an ironic effect to his death.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why did God create Ebola? Because he hates us all.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

A Japanese man, a Canadian man and a French woman walk into a bar. They do not converse because they don't speak the same language.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why did the male propagate the female? Because he was drugged. Slyly, this foxy female had slipped the male the date rape drug and a dangerous amount of viagra. During intercourse, the male ripped a gaping hole in the female's stomach and killed her. He woke up confused inside a dead stinking corpse.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Q: How do you make a five year cry twice? A: There are many ways, as children are generally not that adept at controlling their emotions. Loud noises, threats of violence, images of scary monsters... those tend to work. Be sure to let them stop crying before making them cry again, otherwise you will have only made them cry once.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What did the psychiatrist say to the man wearing nothing but Saran Wrap? - "That's for food. You should wear clothes instead."

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Roses are red Im adopted

thumb_up thumb_down -21

what did the bus driver say to the black man when he got on the bus? nothing, carl has become very anti-social since his brother died

thumb_up thumb_down -21

why didn't the donkey go to the party? Because, unfortunately he did not have the required linguistic skills to communicate with the person inviting. This is obviously dependent on whether the person who invited him was a human, if it was another donkey then perhaps this would of happened. However, this is also very unlikely as donkeys do not have parties or really communicate

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops