Why did the camel cross the road? He was off to see the wizard, the wonderful wizard of OZ.

How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? First of all, babies do not have the physical ability or the mental capacity to ever paint a wall, no matter how many of them there are. Second of all, they are dead which probably will not increase their chances of painting said wall.

your mamas so fat she tried to hang herself but the rope broke.

the teacher enters the room she sits in her chair and yells, "i am your substitute teacher. get out your books and write me a story."

How many babies could a cannibal eat? 132/267 of a baby

why do jews like money? So they can support their family.

Ask me if I'm a car. Are you a car¿ Yes¡

a dyslexic man walked his god.

I cried because I had no shoes until I met a man with no feet... ...then I made fun of him and laughed.

A man walks into a bar. After recovering, he sues the bar for it's irregular glass doors.

What's the sexiest thing on a farm? It depends on what you find sexy, and your personal perception of a farm.

A man walks into a bar. He is rushed to the hospital and has his wounds treated.

99 bottles of beer on the wall, 99 bottles of beer, take one down pass it around, 98 bottles of beer on the wall. 10 minutes into the song one man succumbs to alcohol poisoning.

Q: Why did the guy fall off his bike? A: He got shot!

Two men stay at the bar all night drinking non stop. They soon are rushed to the hospital to get their stomachs pumped.

What did the gay man receive for christmas? AIDS

What has three legs, one eye, and is green and fuzzy. I don't know. Me either.

What's the difference between an elephant and a grape? They're both purple. Except for the elephant.

What did the Colombian say to the Peruvian? Quieres lleyo?

Ask me if i'm a tree. Are you a tree? No. okay? Why did the chicken cross the road? why? because its motor skills allowed it to cross. dude, seriously? What did Jimmy's grandmother get him for Christmas? What?. Nothing she died two years ago. that's horrible. When did she die? On his birthday. Dude, stop! Wait how did she die? Fine, How? She was driving down the road and swerved to miss a chicken. oh. And what did she hit? UGGG What? Thankfully not me. because I wasn't the tree. :0 oooooooooooooh

When I was in 4th grade, I was fat. The other kids would take my lunch and spit in all the food, then give it back. Teachers started to wonder why I wasn't eating, and soon began to ask me if I was anorexic. I replied, "do I look anorexic!?" I'm now 6 foot 3 and weigh 56 pounds. *FUN FACT: based on a heartwarming true story.

Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it was dead. Q2: Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? A2: It was nailed to the first one. Q3: Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? A3: Peer pressure.

What did the minority say to the white person? Aboobasashagaboogly. He was uneducated, along with the other minorities in the world.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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