Why is it so hard to find slim fitting clothes in America? Because not many clothing stores carry them.

Why couldn't John go to the store for his mother? He had no legs...

Knock knock. Get out!!

what does 2+2equals? i think its 3 but i could be wrong

Roses are red Violets are blue I love you a lot But you're dead and I have unhealthy necrophiliac tendencies

How does a cancer patient bathe? He can't because he lives in an arid climate where water is scarce.

whats worse than 4 dead monkeys? 5 dead monkeys.

what's the only thing funnier than a dead baby nailed to a tree? The look on the mom's face.

Chuck Norris.

Why did he chicken cross the road? The suicide rate in chickens has gone up 50% in the past year alone.

9-11 please state your emergency. My house is flooding! Dad, youre in the swimming pool.

What is Godzilla's favorite sport? Nothing, Godzilla is a fictional character.

what did the oven say to the firdge you hot baby

A family walks into a talent agency. Talen agent says "Okay, what's your act called?" Dad replies "The Aristocrats!"

How do you steal from a sushi buffet? You say please.

Timmy eats 32 cookies and eats 30 of them. What does he have? Type 2 Diabetes.

God hates fags, no...god i'snt real

A horse walked into a bar. The bar was part of the fence he was enclosed by.

What would you do for a kwuandike bar? Anything clean and sanitary that wouldn't provide harm to me or others near me

Why is did the blonde cross the road? She was trying to catch the chicken.

what did the black man say to the Muslim? "you the bomb"!

An asian man walks into a bar and lights a cigarette. He is politely asked to leave due to smoking being prohibited indoors.

Your mom is so fat, she weighs 732 kilograms.

whats brown and rhymes with snoop? Dr. Dre

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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