Knock Knock Who's There Not you... What? *Pulls out finger gun* *Screams BOOM!*

Why did the guy lose the race? Because he had explosive diarrhea

whats the differnce between madalin macan and batman?...batman returns

Why did the Grizzly bear refrain from attacking the hiker? It didn't. The hiker was torn to shreds within minutes.

If I earned a dollar for every time you've said, "I'm too old for this sh*t," I wouldn't have made very much money. You are a giraffe.

A man jumped off a bridge. He went bungee jumping with his family and had a great time.

Whats green? Mountain Dew.

I like my women like bacon. Greasy and full of wrinkels

Yo Momma So Fat!

Whats funnier than 1 dead baby? 2 Dead babies

Why did the man go to McDonalds? Because he was a pedophile.

Hurr durr, I shit my pants.

Why did the chicken cross the road? How the hell should I know? I'm not a chicken :/

what is black and hangs from the tree in my back yard? a moldy apple.

Knock Knock. Who's There? I don't know. I'm paralyzed.

Why is elmo sad? He was brutally raped by Dora :D

A man agreed with a camel. The camel didn't agree. ... (This joke does only make sense in the Dutch language.)

caoimhin is a dorty carrot

Why can't Helen Keller drive? She is a woman.

How was breakdancing inventented? From niggas trying to steal hubcaps of moving cars!

I dont think i could ever stab someone, I can barely get a straw through a capri sun

Your mama is so fat, we are all severely concerned for her health

What has 17 eyes, 43 toes, 11 feet and, 9 heads? A 17 eyed- 43 toed- 11 footed- 9 headed monster.

'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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