whate white and cant climb trees? powdered sugar

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What is the biggest lie ever? "I have read and agreed to the Terms of Use"

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Chris is hairy

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What day is it? Asked the man with a gun who dislikes music. Friday. Mostly because yesterday was thursday and tomorrow is Saturday. Sunday comes afterwards also. The man says "oh. I thought it was Tuesday."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Doesn't matter. He was hit by a semi truck.

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where does al queda go on a business trip the twin towers

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womens rights

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what looks like a bananna but is blue a blue bananna

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There once was a man from Dundee, Whose Limericks ended on line three. I don't know why.

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What do you call a cow who can't produce milk? Utter failure.

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Shut up, I already got that before you said it, typed it, whatever I do not give a fuck, I want the last word because, reasons of millions. I love you Nero come visit me sometime, wait ill come visit you, yes yes, but now shut up, I want the last word, because I made myself your bitch! You know its not what I mean the other way but then around again, I think, you are my I made myself your bitch, no wait, keep reading, you are, my bitch master..., pretty please let me have the last word? Never fucking mind! Have the last word, I surrender, I totally surrender I want my nose back XD.

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Q: What do you call a dog with no legs? A: Immobile.

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Q. Whats red and smells like blue paint? A. Wheres my tractor?

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Why was it okay for the people in the hospital to laugh at the patient with narcolepsy? It wasn't. The patients were treated due to moral obligations. But the doctors that laughed had either been fired or warned, depending on if there were previous reports of exploitation of patients.

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Knock knock. Who's there? John. John who? I can't remember. I have amnesia from when I was hit by a bus as a child.

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what do you do when life gives you lemons? take them, free shit is cool!

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What do you call a blonde who can't read? an infant

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Yo momma so normal, she got married, had three kids and then lived a dull but contented life.

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A brachiosaurus walks into a cafe "Excuse me I'm an herbivore, can I have a full English breakfast, but with veggie sausages instead of normal sausages, and mushrooms instead of bacon?" Shop keeper: "No you can't. Your too big. You've destroyed my kitchen, and my livelihood. I have nothing left. You've accidently reduced my business to rubble by walking through the door"

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Do Re Mi Fa So La Ti Only musicians will understand.

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Q:What did the duck say to the other duck A:We are both ducks

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Hey I just met you, And this is crazy, I've got dementia, Hey I just met you.

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Knock Knock. There was no answer.

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Cameron is a r e t a r d

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops