What's worse than finding ants in your kitchen? A truckload of dead babies.

Q:Whats big, red and eats rocks? A: A big red rock eater

A man asks a young boy to get in his van. The kid, being very well-educated tells the man he cannot talk to strangers. So, the man tells the kid he understands, and drives away to another nearby child.

What do a turtle an a bird have in common? They both fly except the turtle

How does a black man get to his parent's house on Christmas? He drives

What's the worst way to say you want to break up? Kill her dog.

What's worse than a baby on a pitchfork? Two babies on a pitchfork.

What's the object with the most points according to science and math? A sphere.

Knock Knock Who's there? Me ill kill u,

Mary had a little lamb... The doctor fainted

What did the man screem before he crashed his car? i dont know, he died.

What did the Ginger get for his birthday? A soul...................................……................……………•

Why doesn't my mom make dinner anymore? she died in a fire on my birthday.

Why was Billy no mates? He had no friends.

I have existed for over 6000 years and around vi0lating people long before you where ever born kid... You do not believe me you say? friendly r*pist neighbourhood Moral Man: You do not believe me? According to this DNA test... Welcome to papa son/daughter... Its time to make you a man/woman now, and then TIME TO MAKE YOU my BlTCH!

A duck, a goose, a turkey and a bald eagle were all flying together. All four of them were shot and killed by drunk hunters with machine guns. The hunters were promptly arrested by police authorities for shooting their national symbol. They were found guilty, and the other three birds were cooked for their last meals.

Why do midgets laugh when they run? Because the grass tickles there balls

Johnny fell out of the window. Except he didn't fall I pushed him

What did one cow say to the other? Moo.

Why did the man scream when his dog ran into the room? Because he was afraid of dogs.

Suicide Johnny and the Go Kill Yourselves

Wanna know what I don't get? I was gonna say yo face, but that would be mean.

Hats better than a stick? A stone

I was there when Lebron James hit a home run to win the Super Bowl.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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