What the difference between a car and a dead child I dont have a car in the basement

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Knock knock. ... Knock knock. ... Knock knock. ... The FedEx man leaves, realizing that no one was home, and continues on with his job.

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What is the leading cause of death? - Dying.

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What's green and eats nuts? Syphilis.

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Jimmy: I'm like hey, what's up, hello. Jon: I've already met you.

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how do you stop santa from laughing? snap his neck.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? a brick.

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A young boy is concerned about the well- being of his father, due to the fact he may have cancer. Turns out, he doesn't. So they got ice cream.

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whats worse than 10 dead babies in a bucket 5 are alive and eating the others

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What did the retarded handicap say to the bully who called him the biggest retard in the world? "atleast I didn't make SOPA"

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i'm here at a school my friend is eats a pool fuck yeh

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What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson? Neil Armstrong walked on the moon and Michael Jackson appeared in court several times under charges of child molestation

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What fruit is used to make apple juice? Apples

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How many frogs does it take to change a light bulb None. Frogs lack the cranial capacity to change said lightbulb. If eventually by evolution they become smart enough to change lightbulbs, they may learn to handle machinery and pose a real threat to humans.

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Why was the uneducated black guy raped? To make this joke more risky and therefore funnier.

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How do you kill a black man wearing a bullet proof turbin? Shoot him anywere other then his turbin.

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What did the man on the moon say? ...Im on the moon.

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Timmy needed to use the restroom in class, so he raised his hand and asked, "Can I go use the restroom?". The teacher said " I don't know, CAN you?" Timmy said, "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?"

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What's the difference between Tom and Jerry? One is a cat, and the other is a mouse.

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wanna hear a joke? womans rights

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea?! No one... pineapples float.

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How many Woman does it take to change a lightbulb? none they had a back up lamp

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What kind of cheese isn't yours? Someone else's.

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Q: How many Babies does it take to paint a garage? A: babies do not have good motor skills therefore, they can not hold a paint brush.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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