What do you say if you wake up and see your television floating around at night? Say,"I should probably get to sleep. This is probably an effect of sleep deprivation."

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Q: Why did Tom bought a new sweeper? A : because his grandma fired their maid

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okay, there was a donkey and a parrot walking at the park. When it was raining the donkey says to parrot hey why is it so hot. Then a person riding bikes come to the parrot and she told her to sit down. Nobody saying hello but she can dance reallly nicely.

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Q: Why did Captain Kirk suck his own dick? A: Nobody else was around, I guess.

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What do you call a bad joke website? anti joke

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once, my friend said hi. i said hi back

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What's worse than finding an apple in your apple Finding a black guy in your school

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What did Tarzan say when the elephants came over the hill? Here come the elephants over the hill!

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What goes round and knocks on windows? A paedophile.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU..

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What gets wetter as it dries? Sarah Jessica Parker

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What did the marshmallow say to the other marshmallow? We are both bananas.

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What do we call Osama? Osama

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Whats the similarity between a bike and a black person? They are both stolen

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So, there was two monkeys sitting in a bath tub one says "Hey, could you pass the soap?" the other says "what do I look like a typewriter?"

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More mindfuck: Your school is betraying you edition. How are you going to feel good about yourself, if you have to UNDER STAND everything you learn? Moral: If you dont get it, you are not ready.

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Two drums and a cymbal fall off a cliff. They all broke beyond repair.

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What did the man say to his friend when he beat him in a game of billiards? Good Game.

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Q. What's big, green, has four legs, fuzzy, and if fell out of a tree would kill you? A. A pool table

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Whats the difference between a muslim and a christian? They believe in different things.

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If a red house has red bricks, and a yellow house has yellow bricks, what colour of bricks does a greenhouse have? Greenhouses are made of glass.

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what is the difference between a bucket of shit and a black person? the bucket the bucket

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Voldemort's nose is so flat, that it looks like he doesn't have a nose.

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whats worse than having the flu? having cancer

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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