What did the dog get for Christmas? euthanization

Knock Knock Who's There Al Qaeda

Why did the man kill the hamster? To get to the other side.

What did the cat say to the other cat? Meow

I have read and agree to the Terms of Service.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I'm a fish out of water. Help me I'm suffocating.

Why did he chicken cross the road? The suicide rate in chickens has gone up 50% in the past year alone.

Why was Jimmy upset? Someone kept pouring liquid nitrogen on him.

Why do bees fly? Because evolution made them

I woke up in bed with someone this morning. I forget why this is a joke, but your mother is a whore.

Why couldn't the child go to the park? He was a registered sex offender.

If George Washington was the first president, and Barack Obama is the latest, how old is my grandma?

What's black and white and red all over? A greyish red object.

Knock knock Who's there? The Land Lord The Land Lord who? I am here to evict you.

What did Cinderella wear at the ball? Clothes

V I T A M I N C !

Why was the boy seeing stars? It was night time.

Did you hear about the new XBOX releasing in Mexico. It's called the XBOX JUAN!!!

If I had xray vision I'd go to a black jack table and when the dealer dealt everyone there cards I would look at the hot girls boobs

your mother is such a nice person that most people enjoy her company

What did Michael Jackson say to the little boys before they came to his house? Get on the ferris wheel

How do Yankees fans cheer for their favorite sports team? Let's go Yankees!

What does "Ford" stand for? Nothing. It's the name of the company founder, not an acronym.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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