What do you call an armless, legless man hanging on a wall? Art.

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All the kids at school we're playing soccer on a sunny day except Jenny, because she had a headache and didn't come to school that day

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Why didnt the boy go to school? His mum threw a fridge at him!

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Knock Knock!! Who's there? Dyphis, say goodbye to your kids.

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Why is The stop sign bent? Because a ambulance full of sick kids hit it.

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Why did the cat cross the street? It didn't. I cut off its arms and legs so it couldn't walk.

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Why did the chicken cross the mobius strip? to ge to the same side

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Once a upon a midnight haven. Along came a cow name Mr. Maven. For they say the cow was very lucky. But oh what a day for something very mucky. Oh ye the coming of Mr. Maven and his milk. And for every cereal there will be silk. But wait isn't Mr. Maven a guy? How can you milk him even if you try? I don't know, just sounds cool.

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How do you get Sally of the swing? Throw a clown at her.

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A Jew walks into a bar. He immediately turns around and walks out because prices at this particular high end bar are much too high for his liking.

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Roses are red violets are blue. A face like yours belongs in the zoo! But don't you worry I'll be there too! But not in the Ill be laughing at you

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I'd love to submit an anti joke, but unfortunatley I don't own a computer.

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Q. What is the difference between an ass kisser and a brown noser? A. Depth Perception.

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Why did the black man walk into the white house? Cause he lives there because he is our president

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, It's none of my business.

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Jack and Jill went up the hill....Just kidding, it was only Jill. Jack had no legs

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A mermaid found a magic lamp at the bottom of the ocean. She rubbed it and a cat with 9 lives came out so he didn't drown.

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What did the starving african child get for his birthday Ebola

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Why did the constipated man go to the bathroom? To intentionally throw up; he has an eating disorder.

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What did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? X box Kinect

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Why did the boy fall of the swing He had no arms

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What do you call a fat jew? A person that most likely has an eating problem and needs to seek help from the nearest rabbi

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Hey, did you hear about the guy who got his left arm and left leg cut off? Yeah, it was pretty brutal. His right arm and right leg got cut off, too.

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Why did the frog commit suicide? Because his mother was a typewriter

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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