Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread

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One day a kid said to his mom: "Mom, I painted the bed sheets with your lipstick". So his mom got mad.

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If u give brandon a stick he will most likely poke u

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Knock Know Who's there? Not your dog, he just got run over.

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What's worse than eating a baby? Eating two babies filled with maggots.

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What is the only non-racist animal? The mexican panda. Why? It's black, white, hispanic, and asian.

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What happened to the Asian who ran into the wall with a boner? He ejaculated his sperm, impregnating the wall. The wall went to the authorities, and the man was charged with rape. He is now serving a 10 year prison sentence, with no possibility of parole.

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An IRS agent named Harold Crick finds that he has the ability to hear a narrator comment on every moment of his life. He later becomes institutionalized in the Schizophrenic ward.

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What's the difference between an anti-joke and a joke? The anti-Joke isn't a freaking joke. So stop freaking doing it!

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Q: How many dead babies can you fit in a bath tub? A: This question has many different possible answers due to the range of sizes and shapes of bath tubs available on the market, and also depending on the size of the baby in question. It is therefore only possible to give a specific example.

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What do you call flashlight in an Asian kids room what ever the brand is

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A Catholic, a Protestant, and a Jew are stranded in the middle of the ocean on a raft. They all die of dysentery.

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This guy gets on a plane and leaves he takes a bite of a green Apple and says to sower then he takes a bite out of a red Apple and says to sweet so he takes a bite of a gernade and says to crunchy so the plane lands and he walks past a little boy crying and says little boy why are you crying because a green Apple came down and hit my dog in the head so he's walking along and sees a nether boy crying and says little boy why are you crying cause a red Apple came down and hit me on the head so he's walking along abd sees a little girl laughing little girl he says why are you laughing cause I farted and the building be hind me bluw up lol ????

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what do call a girl with a waterslide nose? Ava Sherman

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A man walked into a pub, and enjoys of a couple off pints. Some time later he loudly asks the gentleman next to him: Do you know about this thing called Fightclub?... The bartender had to call an ambulance, you don't talk about fightclub

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a pool? An ambulance.

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What do you get when you cross an elephant and a rhino? El-if-iknow

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what's black and hangs from a tree in my garden? a blackberry

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Why is it so hard to find slim fitting clothes in America? Because not many clothing stores carry them.

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what is sadder than lost in a ps4 game ? Your mom's funeral, she died in a horrible accident yesterday

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs hanging on the wall? Wally.

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Yo mamma's so fat that the gravity required to keep her on the ground is significantly smaller than an average sized human.

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What do you call a Mexican who steals cars? John Doe, until he's been identified.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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