I used to have an ugly,black and disabled man as a friend. However, he had a very nasty personality so we are no longer friends.

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What's Green and has Wheels? Ian Leighton... I LIED ABOUT THE GREEN

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A bar walks into a man... The man begins screaming uncontrollably as the corner of the building is inserted into his anus. Brick by brick, the bar forces its way inside the man's ass, as blood begins dripping down his legs. The man knows damn well it is impossible for such a large building to be contained inside him, but he grits his teeth and forces his ass open wider. His ribs break, his lungs collapse, and his now lifeless body is stretched into the shape of the bar. The bar is almost entirely consumed before the man's skin gives way to the bulging pressure...with an explosion of blood & organs, the shredded remains of the man are slung-shot around the lot where the bar formerly stood. The bar, now soaked in a mixture of blood & organ fluid, reflects upon the failure of its experiment. For the next attempt, a man of far greater fortitude must be used, so that his body does not burst so easily. Only then will it achieve its dream of becoming the first bar to walk into a man.

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Chuck Norris walks up to a baby and punches it in the face He walks away and laughs

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A man decided it was time to quit his job so he put his 2 weeks in and went to look for another job.

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How many dead babies can you fit in the trunk of a car? Any number if compressed sufficiently. At neutron star density all babies in the world would fit.

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2 sheeps are outside having a great time One sheep walks up to the other sheep and says: hello The other sheep says: hello Now what I want to know: what ally do you get your drugs from

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Why is The stop sign bent? Because a ambulance full of sick kids hit it.

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why did the cow cross the road because he wanted to go to the mooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooove

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Why did Hitler kill himslef? He saw his gas bills.

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whats worse than sitting next to jack grindey nothing

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An anti joke a day... really doesn't actually do that much

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what kind of pizzas did the twin tower executives order on 9-11? two large "planes"

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why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the house. knock knock. who's there? the chicken!

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Why do dragons shoot fire? I don't know, I'm asking you the question.

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George Bush told Jared Fogle that he did 9/11. Jared Fogle replied "I did 9 11 year olds"

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q ggggggggggggggggg

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Q. What goes 100 mph and is green? A. A frog in a blender

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Hey I just met you, And this is crazy, I've got dementia, Hey I just met you.

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Next time someone says "I have mad money"... Say "whys it mad"

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Hey guys I'm more of a Nets fan.

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A black man walks out of a police station

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Boy: Why is the sky blue? Man: Because it is

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Fred: Hey man where were you last night. Steve: Why don't yo ask yo mama.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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