What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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When life gives you melons you may be dyslexic.

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How do you piss off a moose? You throw popcorn at it

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There are 2 kinds of people in this world... 1.Those who need closure.

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knock knock whos there **gunshot ...man that gun show next door is annoying

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm bad at poems... Nice t*ts

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Whats worse than the Holocaust? Jews

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How did Billy tip the cow? He didn't, cows are animals and that would be wrong.

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If you send someone fudge, you should write them a poem with it Roses are red Violets are blue Fudge is brown Here's some fudge!

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"Whats that boy? Timmy fell down the well??" Bout time

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What do you call a group with one Jew and three Germans? Friends

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Why did the blond fail her math test? Because she got all the questions wrong.

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why girl die cancer

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Scenario: Two guys are out hunting. Two guys are walking and a one falls down. The other calls 911 and the guy still standing asks what to do. The person at the hospital told him to make sure his friend was dead, then heard a gunshot. The guy who called said "Now what do I do?"

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why did the little girl eat grapes? because she felt like it.

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Why'd the clown fall out of the tree? it died. Why'd the cat fall out of the tree? it died Why'd the chicken fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the clown

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Whats the difference between a soccer ball and a baby? Babies cry when I kick them.

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Why did Susie fall off of the swing? Because she had no arms or legs. Why did Susie drown? Because she fell in a puddle. Knock knock Who's there Not Suzy!

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How many armless people does it take to change a lightbulb? I dunno, that's why I asked you... Hello?

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How do you make 5 lbs of fat look good? Draw a smiley face on it.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the first monkey Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure

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How many apple does it take to turn a fridge into a water buffalo? Yellow tactics because of the Minty fragrance

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Two girls are in a car together. The one in the drivers seat is texting while driving. The girl in the passengers seat notices this and tells her the she should put it away in case of a risk of a collision. She apologizes and puts it away and the two of them drive to the store unharmed and continued their normal day.

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A Black man, a Latino, and a Midget get into a car. They drive to the county fair, get snow cones and ride the tilt-a-whirl.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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