I like my coffee the same way I like my women: without a penis!

What do you call a car with no wheels? Trash

what did the teacher say to the students when she was talking about the solar system The sun is very hot. At the core it is 15 million degrees Celsius or 27 million degrees Farenheit. Using a magnifying glass, we can see the very hot heat and the light of the sun. Please do not do that because it can hurt your eyes. This makes the light very bright and the heat is so hot it could start a fire.

why did the blonde put on a coat? because she was cold.

A man walked into a bar....he's OK.

What did the elephant say to the pelican? He didn't say anything. I lied.

What do you call it when Justin Beiber has sex with a girl? Consensual sexual intercourse between two young adults.

In the time it has taken you to read this, a small African child has died.

Hi welcome to yack in da box, can i hell you? Yes, could i have a jumbo jack? Jew wanna yumbo yack? Yes.

why should not women able to vote? because their stupid and should not vote at all

Why couldn't the cat drink his milk? Because his ears were stapled to the floor.

a potato a chicken and a rooster ate a cat and you just wasted your time

If the blue dog falls out of sample object, how many bananas does my mom eat? No, because markers can't talk

What is the french word for penis? I cannot say because I do not possess an adequate knowledge of the language.

Truth is Jordan Abu aita has a hairy @ss

Why don't jews believe in Jesus Because jews believe Jesus Christ was not their savior

what dyu call a bunch of white guys on a bench? the NBA

You're tearing apart, Lisa!

FRED CLEAN YOUR ROOM! Ok mom, I'm done "Nothing is cleaned" Well.. I tried

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Roll Pop? Depends. Are you applying a lot of pressure and licking in short, round bursts, or are you softly suckling on the treat? Your mouth's pH level is also a determining factor, as the sucker digests at a quicker rate the higher the acid content. To put it simply, there is no correct answer, because the sheer quantity of variables makes it a tootsie-less endeavor. See how I said tootsie-less rather than fruitless? Now that's a real joke.

Why did the boy fail his test? Because he got shot before he could even study.

Why did the black man wash his feet? PHOIT!!!! He washed his feet in a bird bath... Too bad his car got thrown off a cliff by a bald eagle with no feathers?

had a good wank over anime yesterday xoxo dylan hodge

Why did the black man jump off the cliff? Well , you see, this black mans name was yargle, and during his high school years, people always made nicknames for him some of which were fat yargle, yargaryar, and bottomyarg. He thought to himself that wanted revenge, So he killed the entire population of earth. Oh ya, and since he was the last human, wirhout possibility of reproduction, he went to the store and bought a can of soup

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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