Three men were on a plane. Oh wait. You probably already heard this one.

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How many women does it take to ski across the pit of lava? None, they would burn and die.

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Roses are red,violets are blue, i love the colour red and green but its a pitty because im not so keen.

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Her hair was fine, her scent was great, now show me your fucking ****.......please

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If quizzes are quizical, what are tests? Testicals

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why was the pineapple bullied at school? cuz it was a pineapple duhhhhhhh

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Howmany licks does it take till you get to the tootsie roll center of tootsie pop? Well, The answer is not constant. There are many variables that need to be taken into account. Though the ph level of human saliva is a neutral seven it can vary about 2 tenths of a point from person to person. This is a factor that needs to be considered along with the size of the tongue, roughness of the tongue, and at what speed the licking is taking place at. After taking all these variables into consideration, the average number of licks it would take untill the chocolate center of a tootsie pop is approximately, 3 .

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Knock Knock. Hello Frank! How'd you know it was me? There is a window next to the door.

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here's a joke... the american education society

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Why did the child say he had been a ubused. Answer: because he had been.

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A priest, a rabbi, and a muslim cleric walk into a bar. In Syria. Dead children.

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What's white and can't climb a tree? A fridge

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What's green and hangs from trees? Leafs

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Roses are red Violets are blue i have aides egg

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A boy got scratched by a dog and nearly killed him. When he grew up, a dog came running up to him and started biting and scratching him till he couldn't handle it. Then a plane crashed into him and he died.

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How do Chinese people name their kids? They could look up a baby-names book, consult their family history, or make one up

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A man is on a military operation, he dies and has a funeral.

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A man is driving down the highway. He falls asleep at the wheel due to his case of narcolepsy, and dies in a fiery car crash.

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Sarah lost both arms in a car accident Knock knock Who's there? Not sarah. Roses are red Violets are blue Wow. Clever Knock knock Who's there? Still not Sarah, as she is in a serious condition at her local hospital, and so is fighting for her life.

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Your mom is so stupid that she was unable to make it into the college of her choice.

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Have you seen stevie wonders new house No Niether has he

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-Knock Knock? -Who's There? -David Baxter. -David Baxter Who? -Wha- What? What do you mean "David Baxter who?" We were best friends in high school. YOU WERE THE BEST MAN AT MY WEDDING!! *David Baxter proceeds to cry, as he doesn't know of his dear friend's Alzheimer's disease*

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Whats the differnce betwwen a Wheelbarrow and a sack of dead babies The wheelbarrow is not in my garage

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A Man thought it was a good day and to go on anti-joke.com then he saw a post that had a link. This man was you and the link was http://minedgamez.tk/beta/ The man then clicked the link and fucking laughed so hard xD. She died in a car crash. Then a pickle appeared. It was then eaten by you not realizing it was actually a hamster.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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