Why did the blonde stare at the juice carton? Because a man was pointing a shotgun at her and would kill her if she didn't do it.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's Where am I

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How many holes can you poke in my chest, When my chest is by far the best If you believe you can stab Then then grab a knife...that you can grab Skewer my breast Which lies on the best chest And you will discover A man under your covers Yes, keep on pokin' Poke my chest with the knife you are strokin' And then swallow a chode because you are stupid.

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Q: What's not funny and has three wheels? A: The Holocaust, I lied about the wheels and not being funny.

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Why did the Mexican fall off of a cliff? He lost is ballence.

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What's worse than finding a worm in an apple? Finding out that your girlfriend is really a drag queen and that that is why you have never had sex. -Harrison

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Kidding, not trucing, Dylan sucks prick. Brock likes his mums butt.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra. He is promptly arrested for sexual harassment.

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Take part of what?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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A blonde walks into a bar therefore her face hurts

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What do you call a woman with two black eyes? Irish sunglasses

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"Do you have Prince Albert in a can?" "No." "Good. Tobacco causes cancer."

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Your mother has cupcakes, she offers you one, how many does she have left? The same amount she had before, you are full. Moral: Cupcakes.

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I SWEAR TO GOD I'M NOT GAY! But my boyfriend is. Love you, Jeff.

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How many dyslexic people does it take to ruin Christmas? One, because they murdered you mother on your birthday.

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What's the relationship between a frog and a building? They have nothing to do with each other so stop trying to figure out this query.

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Why do people hate Jews? Because there is nothing to like about them

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two friends are hanging out, one says to the other "whats 5 plus 5" the other says, "you know i didnt finish school and i dont appriceate you making fun of me" the other boy looks away and walks off

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What is one similarity between John Samos, and the dreadful clown? they have a red nose and are payed to be funny, aside from John Samos!

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#So tell me what you want, what you really really want, so tell me what you want, what you really really want.# OhOk then. I'll take that photo of your mother.

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Pick a number between 2 and 8. Now multiply that number by 9. Now add the 2 digits of that answer together. (example 18 is 1+8) Now subtract that answer number by 5. Now choose the letter below that corresponds to that answer. 1 = A 2 = B 3 = C 4 = D 5 = E 6 = F Now pick a country that starts with that letter. Now pick an animal where the first letter of the animals name is the last letter of the country's name. Now think of a color where the first letter of the colors name is the last letter of the animals name. - - - - - - - - - - - - - - Are you thinking of an orange kangaroo from Denmark?

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3 guys get stuck in a island and find indians and the indians say the three guys have to stick 10 of the same fruits up there or they die. The first guy came back with oranges but stops at 3 then gets killed. the second had grapes and stop at 2 and gets killed. But in heaven the first guy ask why did you stop at 2 there grapes. the second guy said he saw the third with a pineapple.

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Whats the definition of not winning? Charlie sheen losing custody of his son because he is a coked out, old man douche bag, who only gets told what he wants to hear because he forks out lots of money to gold digging hookers.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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