What did the lion say on a hot day in Africa? Nothing, lions can't talk.

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What did the towel say to the other towel? Nothing, there was no topic of conversation.

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Cancer

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How do you get the pesky neighborhood kids off your front lawn? Molest them.

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Q: pete and re-pete were on a boat, pete fell off. who was left? A: i dont know, but why did pete fall off in the first place, that dumb ass

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How does a man with no arms and legs get to your door. After asking his name please help us out with this question

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Why didn't the octopus have any friends? Because they are antisocial creatures by nature. -Louis

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A man dies from a cat attack. he goes up to heaven. At the gates, St. Peter asks him, " how did you die sir?" The man doesn't reply so Peter says, "cat got your tongue?" "No," he says, "cat got my throat!"

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Q: Who stole the cookies from the cookie jar? A: A burglar

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As he stood in her front yard with a boombox in the pouring rain, she leaned her head out the window with a smile and he was electrocuted.

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Kid: Mom I'm gonna dig a hole all the way to China! Mom: That's sweet but it's impossible dear. You'll get to tired after awhile to go any farther. Also, by any chance you did dig really deep, you would melt and die if you got the the center because the magma will kill you when you get to it. Alright son? Kid: What?

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What does a frog in a blender sound like? *WWWRRRRRRRBFFFFZZZZZCHWEEERRRRRR*

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Chip and Dale walk into a bar. Chip is black now.

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What's worse than an hours detention? Gettind raped by a horse anally.

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I'm a vegan thats why I am still a Virgin.

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So Superman walks into a bar right, WRONG, Superman flies into bar

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What's good about eating every night? Knowing that an African won't.

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I got 99 problems but a bitch ain't one . Though , I do have cancer .

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What do you call a black guy flying a plane? A pilot.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have a gun And you don't,

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Why did the cop pull over a black guy? The man was breaking the law by going 82 mph in a 70 mph zone, which resulted in a 100 doller fine. Oh and the cop was a racist.

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What did Mel Gibson say to the African-American? I'm sorry

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How do you kill a blonde? Push her off a cliff.

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Your family tree is like a cactus, its full of pricks. ;P

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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