What did the 3 month old puppy get for Valentines day? Heart Worms. What'd he get for Christmas? Put down.

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like this or you will die at some point in your life

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josh moran where your Bluetooth gone?

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…What did you put in the drink that made me fart, and kill my horse?

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Two elephants were in a bathtub. One elephant asks the other "pass the soap?" The other elephant passes him the soap and they continue with their bath.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I suck at poetry, Show me your tits.

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you are as stupid as alec. lol neewb

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Shut up max im not fucking demented u dickhead

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What's a black man that drives a bus? A bus-driver

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it wanted to.

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There once was a man from Nantucket. He lived a long, full life. Outside of Nantucket. But he visited occasionally.

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What is the most dangerous place to be right now? Rodney Kings pool.

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To mama's so fat when she went to Dairy Queen she Ordered a blizzard.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead get pulled over. The cop says "Yuck!" Then shoots the redhead because red hair is disgusting.

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Yeah, haha, I tend to put myself under a state of trance at the same time I put others down there, which makes it difficult to stop it sometimes, I do it for ethical reasons, I mean if I would ever hypnotize someone into feeling really bad, it would affect me as well. You might want to get some water on your face, you know, so your upper lips don't envy the lower ones.

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What do you call someone trying to be funny? An anti-comedian.

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What's better than getting second place in the paralympics? Having legs.

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What's black and blue and hates sex? The 13 year old tied up in my basement.

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What's better than being raped by a donkey? Pie.

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If I was, yet this syndicate was a legal one, necessary in order to maintain world peace trough the means of economical stability and such, would this be acceptable to you? Hypothetically of course.

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Guess What??? Ur Murr

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Why is evan a lil poop? cause he pooped my poop all the pooping ;)

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yo momma is so ugly, she attempted to get plastic surgery and then died from the amount of blood loss she got when the surgeons realized her head was filled with tumors and they failed to extract them.

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There was a chicken. It squarked.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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