What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Oh my gosh a talking muffin.

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What do you call a man with no penis? WOahMan! O_o

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What is the difference between 1 and 2? 2 is a higher number than 1.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because a tree fell on her. Knock Knock Who's There? Not Sally...

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Q: How do you confuse a blonde. A: Put her in a circular room and tell her to pee in the corner. Q: How does a blonde confuse you? A: She says she's done.

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Why did Kurt Cobain commit suicide? Because it was drug related

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A blonde, a brunette and a redhead are all on a deserted island with no food or water. The redhead decides to try and swim to safety, but after a few hours of swimming she becomes to tired to carry on and drowns. After knowing their friend died, the two other women decide that swimming is not a viable option for rescue, so they decide to stay on the island. A few days later a search party rescues them.

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-Knock Knock - Who's there? - Child Protective Services, we have multiple reports of you abusing several of your children...

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A dyslexic blind man walks into the bartender behind the bra

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What is the difference between your mom and a vacuum? The vacuum does not use your mom to clean the floor since it is an inanimate object and can not control people.

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What did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A bicycle

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I have a red ferrari and 20 dead babies in my garage. Didn't I have a blue ferrari?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Cause he felt like it.

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What do you a black man who isn't flying a plane? Well, that depends on his occupation.

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Q. How many leprechauns does it take to screw in a light bulb? A. Light bulbs don't exist

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A Chinese man, a Mexican man and an African man walk into an American bar. None of them know any English and can not order a drink. They walk out promptly, frustrated by the difficulties of living in a strange new world where they don't speak the native language.

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what do you call a blonde skeleton in the closet? last years hide and go seek champion

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is an Italian pastry with tomato sauce, cheese and other toppings and the other is a human being.

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How did the newborn baby come out of a man? It was ejaculated as a sperm from his testicles

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the gay's house. Knock knock. Who's there? The chicken.

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Wanna know a secret? I didn't read or agree to the terms and services

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Three men were on a plane. One chucked an apple out the window. Unfortunately, due to the low pressure outside, all the men were sucked out the window.

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How do you burn alot of calories? Set a fat kid on fire

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops