A blind man walk in to a bar... He then yells a 4 letter explative, backs up, and walks around it.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

A guy walks into a bar and finds a genie. The genie says he'll grant him 3 wishes. He wished for a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead. POOF! All 3 wishes were granted to him. The blonde drinks a shot a tequila, the brunette drinks a beer, and the redhead drinks a whiskey. They had a great time.

Q: What's white and sticky? A: Glue.

Q: Why did the Asian boy pass the math test? A: By studying with dedication to the field.

What characterizes a good joke? The lack of a punch line.

A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

Rarity: "So, what is that splendid frock of yours saying?" Maud Pie: "It doesn't talk. It's a dress."

a black guy, a handicap, a pervert, and a fat guy are sitting in at a booth in a bar... Your watching family guy

A kid walks into a bar. He leaves wasted.

What do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex with a woman? Intercourse.

whats worse than getting ur penis cut off......no holocaust

What's worse than failing a test Drowning

Why didn't the dog want to cross the road? there was a flea market on the other side.

We are not even in the same country, and my eye becomes infected two times a minute or something so I wont be going anywhere. I mean, if you are some guy trying to be a girl in order to screw with me, let me first of all thank you for our exchange of ideas and concepts, and then say that if you are a guy, that likes other guys, then... Well, lets just say that if you are a man, that I don`t speak with men in general, takes away time I can spend with the ladies.

Why did the eskimo drag the seal into the igloo? Because the whale wouldn't fit.

Happy Monday!

Why did the chicken cross the road? Unbeknownst to the farmer, the pen holding the chickens inside the farm had fallen due to bad weather. The chicken unknowingly wandered onto the road nearby. Thankfully it was rescued some minutes later.

Policeman: Knock, knock. Woman: Who's there? Policeman: The police. I'm afraid there's been an accident. Your husband has been killed.

How do you confuse a blonde? To get to the other side

What do Kurt Cobain and a whale have in common? Both have holes in the back of their heads

You smell just like a black person. With your nose.

How are black people and apples the same They both hang from trees

Whats the differents between a red farrari and a dead baby? I dont have a red farrari in my garage;)

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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