What is worse than a dog bite? A shark bite.

How do you tell if an albino baby is black? Check his genetics.

What's worse then having your wife leaving you? Taking the kids with her.

Your mother is so ugly, her genes were passed down through two generations, and now your children are of a similar caliber of ugliness. I'm so sorry.

10 years ago we had Steve Jobs, Bob Hope, and Jonny Cash. Now we have?

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What did the child molestor do? He went home and molested children.

How do you make a little boy cry? Slap the cookie out of his hand.

What did the mute say to the deaf man? Nothing becasue a mute is a person who cannot speak and a deaf man ould not hear the jumbled mumblings anyway.

What did the Africans get for dinner? Nothing.

What do you call a lepucaun leaping in a feild of flowers, on christmas? Ground beef.

what happened to the man that no one cares about? No one cares

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple, finding two worms in your apple. Whats worse than finding two worms in your apple, the Holocaust. Whats worse than the Holocaust, finding three worms in your apple.

What did the lampshade say to the other lampshade? Nothing they sat in silence

Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the bird.

what did the first fire hi-grin say to the second fire hi-grin nothing they can talk it what just really awkward.

What's a fry cook's favorite day? Saturday. It's his day off.

My name is Jacob Mckeand and my penis is as long as Mr. Macs hair.

Three friends were walking to school, they all looked in front of them and ran away. What did they see? A 200 ft dragon eating their school.

A white man, a black man, and a Mexican board a plane. The white man watches the on-flight film. The black man watches the on-flight film. The Mexican also watches the on-flight film. At the end of a long flight, they leave the plane and go do whatever it is they planned to do at their destination.

what's the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? when you slap a mosquito it stops sucking:)

ha ha, I can talk and you can't.

What do you do to vegetables to make them taste good? Nothing. They are still people, and they can't speak up for themselves.

knock knock whos there? i dont know arent you supposed to get the door?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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