Scream went into the bar. The bartender says," Why the long face?" "..." *facepalm*

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Go fuck yourself.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

I'm not hungry, so when my mon offered me a pear I said to her "No thanks, I'm not hungry". 

thumb_up thumb_down +4

what did the policeman say to an armed robber? you can go, as long as you don't hurt my doughnuts

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why would a dog sniff another dog's butt hole? Because that is what they do.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What did the fat kid get for chirstmas? diabetes

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Your mums so tall, she's above the average height of women for her age.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

a charmander decided to take a swim a.w. j.p.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he got hit by a bus

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Shiiit the halls with chunks of feces! Fa-la-la-la-la lala-lala! Taken from all sorts of species! Fa-la-la-la-la lala-lala! Bengal tiger, kangaroo, African elephant, blue whale too! Shit the halls with chunks of feces! Fa-la-la-la-lala-lala!

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A hindu and a muslim walk into a bar. They start arguing over their different fundamental religious beliefs and then considering it is an american bar, an american christian extremist quickly shoots them both for being " from that part of the world"

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Chuck Norris.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What did the penguin say to the polar bear? Nothing, penguins haven't evolved a complex form of language.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What did one cannibal say to the other cannibal? Nothing, because he was eating him.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Roses are red. Violets are blue. Some poems rhyme, but this one doesn't.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What is computers and smells like thin and fragile? dyslexic nipples.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

I just got robbed by an invisible man!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A snail buys a car from a dealership, and then asks the manager if he could paint a large S on the side of the car. The manager agrees, and the snail drives away. From the parking lot, the manager sees the car go straight on to the highway and get hit by a truck. Unfortunately, snails cannot drive.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

How do you make the general public confused? ...

thumb_up thumb_down +4

1,000 americans jump off a plane. They all die as a result of not having parachutes.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

whats fat and sits on a toilet? a fat guy sitting on the toilet

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Tunechi

thumb_up thumb_down +4

LO LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOPLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOO O O O O O O OLO LOL OL O LO LO LO L OL

thumb_up thumb_down +4

person 1:hello person 2:hello person 1:do you want to hear a joke ? person 2:yes person 1:good bye person 2:good bye

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops