Why couldn't the boy watch the DVD about pirates? Because his mother did not understand the importance of putting the disc back in it's case after use, and as a result, has become too damaged for the DVD Player to play.

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What did the Doctor say to the patient. You have AIDS The patient took out a machete and stabbed the Doctor. The Doctor died. Two weeks later, the patient died of AIDS.

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Why didn't the man walk done the stairs? Because he had no legs

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How does a person put an elephant in a closet? First they have to open the door, then put the elephant in and close the door. That was easy well how does a person put a giraffe in. You probably said open the door and put the giraffe in and close the door. Well you missed a step first you have to take the elephant out then you can put in the giraffe. Well both animals are to big to fit in a closet so you can't put them in and also the person who put the animals in is schizophrenic and the animals are fake so if you believed that you could fit them in there you might be delusional.

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Why aren't there any black flesh-colored bandages? Good question.

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Do I know any jokes about sodium hypobromite? As a matter of fact, I do. It goes: "Do I know any jokes about sodium hypobromite? NaBrO."

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Why was the pizza mad? Because he was going thorough a growth spurt and the testosterone got to him.

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Robin, get in the Batmobile.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The holocaust. What's worse than the holocaust? Nothing, you heartless asshole.

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Roses are red Violets are blue These are facts that many people know

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Q:Why did Sara fall off the swing? A: Because she has no arms. ..... Knock knock! who's there? Not Sara, she has no arms and doesn't have the abitlity to knock.

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Why did the toilet paper roll down the hill? ... To get to the bottom.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Interrupting cow Interrupting cow wh- SHUT UP!

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An under aged girl walks into a bar. She couldn't have done so without a fake ID and early development.

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Poker face

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How do you silence Justin Bieber? Hold his head under water until he stops struggling.

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What happens when you throw a red rock into a blue ocean. The rock gets wet.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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You sick fiend

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There was a Jewish man and a German man why was it akward? Because one of them farted

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What is more difficult than trying to get blood from a stone? Trying to teach it Japanese in the process. [L]

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What did the boy with no legs get for Christmas? Dance Dance Revolution

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven they say nothing to eachother because they are muffins and cannot speak if they did they would most likely be taken by the US government and studied and assumed to be alien life forms but anyway the muffins were taken out later and presumably eaten

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Q-What's the good thing about dating a girl volleyball player? A- She's a Girl

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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