2 wales are at the bar one looks at the other and dose a wale call for 5 long minutes and the other one reply's "dude your drunk we got to go"

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How did the black guy swim across the Atlantic? He didn't. He was prepared to, but then went on Expedia and found a ticket with Continental Airlines that was in his budget. He did not like the amount of service he recieved, and decided in the future he will save up and fly with a different company, or in fact swim across.

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Who is stupid and no one likes him. Me. :(

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Your mom is so fat that she has trouble walking up the stairs because she gets easily winded.

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What did Jesus Christ say to John the Baptist? Nothing. He didn't exist.

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Your name is Fired, your Boss comes up to you and says "Your Fired" You say "I know my name." Your boss gets mad and throws you in a chimney

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Haiku doesn't rhyme, And neither does this

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why are you reading these jokes? i have nothing else to do. ok

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

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womans having rights.

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What's green and eats rocks? A green rock eater What's purple and eats rocks? It hasn't been discovered by science yet...

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Why did the old man lose his cane? He didnt. He had alzheimers

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SEX IS LIKE MATH ADD THE BED SUBTRACT THECLOTHES DIVIDE THE LEGS AND PRAY U DONT MULTIPLY!!!!

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What happened to the boy with cancer? He died

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what starts with b and ends with b? The bomb i just planted in your house.

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What did the Goldfish say to the Black man? Nothing, because Goldfish do not have human-like vocal cords and therefore the Goldfish cannot speak.

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Seriosly. too much sex again?

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Knock knock. Who's there? Mom. Mom who? SHUT THE F**K UP AND OPEN THE DOOR!!!

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Why was the man arrested? He assaulted and raped an elderly woman at the local Walmart. He then proceeded to hijack the poor woman's Scooter and lead police on a 4 mile long car chase.

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what does dana do in her free time? make love with jarrett

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Quinn Grifith Randel lives in Roswell, GA

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A black man is running down the street with a purse in his hand. He was trying to catch up to the old woman who forgot it at the restaurant. She was very grateful.

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Q:Why are dinosaurs extinct? A:Well there are two reasons the first being a giant meteor struck the earth killing all the dinosaurs. The other reason you touch yourself at night.

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A brunette, a redhead and a blonde are on the run from the police. They see a barn, and decide to hide inside it. They find three burlap sacks, and each hide in one. The police enter the barn, arrest each of the girls, and sentence them to life imprisonment for murder.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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