what did the leprosy survivor get for christmas a amputation

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What do you call a man with an arrow to the knee? An ambulance because he's got a serious leg injury right there.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What is the best part about being a rapist? The orgasms.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

if you can read this you dont' need glasses

thumb_up thumb_down -24

A black man,a Hispanic man, and a white man are in a race. The white man wins because he took steroids and used somebody else's urine for the drug test.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

why did the 60 year old touch the little boy's penis? because he was a pedophile.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Why did the blonde cross the road? To get to the Public University where she worked as a Ph.D associate professor of linguistics.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

How many dead babies can you fit in a child's swimming pool? 9 (Trust me, you won't be able to squeeze the tenth one in there.)

thumb_up thumb_down -24

How do you confuse a terrorist? Speak another language other than Arabic

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Q: What do you call a black person living in the United States? A: An African American.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Why did the gay man's ass hurt? He has rectal cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

so today i took a poop. hehe

thumb_up thumb_down -24

A Russian gentleman walks into a bar and requests a vodka which the bartender promptly supplies. Shortly thereafter a Turkish gentleman enters escorting a Llama on a leash and requests a vodka to which the bartender responds: "Your animal is not allowed on the premise, I am going to have to ask you to leave." The Turkish gentleman apologizes for his ignorance of the local customs and excuses himself, and shortly thereafter the Russian finishes his Vodka, pays, and leaves as well.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

A man was found dead, in an ice cream van, the other day. He was covered from head to toe in hundreds and thousands, with two flakes sticking out of his ears. The police say it was a tragedy and will be informing his next of kin in the next few days.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

There once was a man from Madrass, whose balls were made out of brass. This was incredibly embarrassing for him, and rendered him infertile and impotent, which in turn affected his relationships with women.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

okay, there was a donkey and a parrot walking at the park. When it was raining the donkey says to parrot hey why is it so hot. Then a person riding bikes come to the parrot and she told her to sit down. Nobody saying hello but she can dance reallly nicely.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Take wrong turns

thumb_up thumb_down -24

in a car crash an entire family is killed from death until they all die

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What do you call a woman in the kitchen? Her name.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why did the chicken cross the road? Umm... Why would it not?

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What is the difference between a refrigerator? Seven anchors because blue isn't vital for turtles to fornicate.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Q: What's worse than finding a shrimp platter on a babys hand. A: A baby's hand on a shrimp platter

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Q: why wasn't the fan spinning? A: because it wasn't on. Duh....

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops