Why didn't Josh go to school? On his way to school, a majestic flying homeless man hit him in the head with a sea cucumber.

A man asked Alexander the Great if he was gay, yet Alexander the Great was not offended. Why? Because "gay" has a rather different connotation than in the modern world than it did in earlier time periods where it meant "happy". Also, Macedonians, Alexander the Great's native people, did not speak English so he would not understand the question. Also Alexander the Great was gay in the sense that he was actually a homosexual.

Whats worse than the Holocaust? Anal

If life gives you melons. You may be dyslexic.

What happened to the boy with cancer? He died.

Why did Suzie's friend put rubbish in her mouth? Because Suzie is a rubbish bin.

what do you call an octopus with 9 tentacles? a male octopus

why did Sarah fall off the swing? she had no arms Knock Knock Who's there? not sarah

Why did humpty dumpty fall off a wall? Well it turns out that he was a raging psycopath. to add on, he was also a suicidal

Once there was an ugly barnical, He was so ugly that everyone died. The end.

What's worse than burning your tongue drinking hot chocolate? Being shanked by a homeless man.

Yo Mama is so fat that she should probably make an appointment with a bariatric surgeon.

There once was a man named bulagala moo moo boom chicka boom. Sometimes, when wipe the toilet tissue breaks and my fingers get all dirty. Good thing I have insurance!

Why did the boy only have one arm? tigers make terrible pets

If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be. He could not be. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. He's either in great danger or has a psychological disorder.

there were two cyclists cycling down a main road in china at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace, one being chinese and the other irish. why did the irish man get stopped and the chinese man not? because the irish man had in fact raped and murdered a young child in his native home town and then fled the country to china.

three white men are running after a black man,, the black man is winning the race

Whats included in over 90% of all car crashes? A Car

How did i get from Pakistan to Iraq Iran

what do you call a dumb blonde with no arms? Her name because she will not respond to anything else

Knock Knock. Who's There? I don't know. I'm paralyzed.

Why does Obama not want to get buried? because he's still alive

A car with three black people in it is driven off a cliff and everyone dies. Why is this a tragedy? Because it is always a tragedy when human life is lost.

What's black, white, and red all over? Numerous different objects because many different things can posses a variety of colors, including the ones listed above.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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