"Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "I am." "Okay, come in."

This sentence is a lie.

one day a guy walks into a bar. he buy's a drink then walks hapily home by Mad James

When life gives you a hamburger, you know you're at Mr. Life's Hamburger Stand on 8th Avenue.

Why did dallin fall off the swing he got hit by jds big penis

Whats green and fuzzy and will kill you if it falls out of a tree? A pool table

How do you kill a baby swinging on a rope attached to a pole at 40 miles an hour? Hit it with a shovel.

What's long and blackand goes all night? night time

What's better then petting a lion? Petting a lion and not getting eaten

Roses are red Roses are white and I one time saw a purple one

What do the world and jelly beans have in common? Nothing.

What did Electra give her Dad for his birthday? Head. That's why her name is Electra.

Why did Michael Vick run? Because he was being chased by defenders.

Why cant African children read? While there are many contributing factors the largest would probably be the lack of a standardized education system mainly due to the logistical factors involved in reaching so many wide spread communities. Also the current economic climate and general disregard for civilians by the governments in these area would suggest that the states' focus would be on other issues besides the welfare of their citizens, this is probably similar to other countries in similar situations such as middle eastern, eastern european, and latin and south america. Then again, not really being educated on this issue in almost any way, has probably contributed to a broad generalization, and so the premise of this joke is most likely flawed in any case.

what did little johnny scream at the xbox after he lost a game? god what the hell! Muskcrat143 i told u to cover my back when i had my predator missile! now my covers blown and i lost my killstreak! god u suck so much and Hippo099 why didn't u kill them before they got a killstreak like wtf!!! i told u to use ur semtex cause i had a claymore set down jeez u guys suck i'm leaving.

how do you get lady gaga to wake up in the morning? Hit her with a brick

How many Jews can you fit in a car? 10. 3 in back, 2 up front and the rest in the ash tray.

An old man, and his daughter are walking down the street. They are having a nice time, until the daughter turns around to see the old man lying on the ground in pain because of the crippling arthritis in his back that has caused him agony and discomfort for years.

Why is it OK to make fun of a deaf person? Because they can't hear.

Q: What is usually black , is a rectangle and has two circles? A: An i pod touch 4

Roses are blue, Violets are red, I have to go to the bathroom now...

How do you make a white girl commit suicide? Bully her.

Q: What do you get when you cross Rebecca Black and a day of the week. A: a stupid song called FRIDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

What's the worst way to say you want to break up? Kill her dog.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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