How do you get a Jew to jump off a cliff? You kidnap his family and threaten to kill them if he doesn’t.

Q) What did the Hobo get for Xmas? A) Nothing

when god created an asian he said 'Crispy"

What's a Gigawat? I made it up.

What is the difference between a black person and an elevator? Well, there are many differences such as the fact that an elevator has a series of wiring and mechanics, while a black man, and white men alike, are human beings.

Tall asians

whats the difference between a fat person and a skinny person ? there weight.

How do you scare a black man? Burn his house down.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? -Because he was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? -He was stapled to the first one Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? -He thought it was a game Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? -He had no arms Why did the girl fall off her bike? -She was hit by 3 monkeys and a refrigerator

A black man and a mexican man jump off the empire state building.Who wins? Nobody,suicide is a serious thing and it is depressing to think that the minorities In America would do such a thing to themselves.

knock knock whos there boo boo who? stop crying its only me! its not you, my mom has cancer, my dad was killed in a car accident, my pregnant wife has been murdered, and my uncle touches me.

Vegeta, what does the scouter say about his power level? Vegeta got rid of the scouter because a monocle built for displaying a person's physical abilities in numbers is extremely farfetched and he didn't want to be a part of a super race of supreme beings that still relied on such ridiculous antics

An old bear-wrestler dies and finds himself at the pearly gates. Confused and at a loss for words due to the unfamiliar circumstance and lack of public toilets, he blurts out "Saint Peter, I presume?" but it was just the train conductor. "Ticket please." He searched his pockets and finally found the ticket. He wished he had a dog, but not a seeing-eye dog because people would assume he was blind. This story illustrates the importance of situational awareness, remembering which pocket you put your ticket in, and not forgetting to go before you leave because you don't know when you'll be able to find a restroom.

Q: why did the black man kill the white man? A: he was clinically depressed, mentally unstable, and had a grudge against the white man that had nothing to do with his race.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

How many Babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends how hard you throw them

When is a door not a door? When your house burns down.

Why did the blonde die? She was slurped up by a 1,000 foot anteater.

Why did Dan fall of his bicycle? Because somebody threw a refrigerator at him.

What's big fat and ugly? A monster

What do you tell a women with two black eyes? Nothing, you've already told her twice..

Hats better than a stick? A stone

She loves me, she dosn't love me, she loves me, the girl walks up to the man and says, she doesn't love me

What is funny about a man who chews tobacco? Nothing, the man was diagnosed with mouth cancer at a young age and got his jaw removed, he was very upset.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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