What do you do when life gives you lemons? You apparently are not a fan of lemons what so ever, so you then throw them away, not knowing what to expect.

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Once there was a ugly barnacle. He was so ugly, everyone died. The end

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I've got some good news an some bad news. The good new is that you just won 10 million dollars! The bad news is I'm just kidding.

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Q: What's worse than finding a fly in your soup? A: Getting your face smashed with a hammer.

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What's worse than stapling a baby to a tree? Stapling the same baby to ten trees.

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A kid asks his mom: "Mom, what would I be when I grow up?" And so his mother answers: "You won't grow up, you have cancer"

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Not to a blind guy.

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How do you get a black man out of a tree? You provide him with a ladder of varying length depending on his height in the tree and hold the ladder to ensure that it is stable and safe while he is climbing down. If he his very high in the tree then it may be helpful to call the fire department for assistance in getting him down.

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What is hard, long, moist, and flesh colored? A hotdog you dirty, dirty bastard!

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you got Lady Gaga, Taylor Swift, and Reese Witherspoon. Which do you think is more succesful

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A dinosaur is walking down the street. He is soon confronted by a human. The human says to the dinosaur, "Hey, your a dinosaur." Which the dinosaur replies with, "Yes, yes i am." The dinosaur then stands there for a few seconds wondering why he is in the same time period as the human. And as to why a dinosaur would talk.

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Whats funnier than watching the kid next to you on the computer? Nothing because he is still trying to figure out that i unplugged his mouse!

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whats the difference between a can and a fish?they can both swim. exept for the can.

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who has moral fiber? a cerial killer

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What did the man in the mirror say to the other man The Same F****** Thing!!

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Why can't Hellen keller drive? Because she's a woman.

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Whats worse than getting a parking ticket? The Bubonic Plague

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What happens when you Shoot a guy with a red Shirt On? He Dies.

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Knock Knock Who's There? Ted. Oh, Hey Ted.

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Why are the black people in Africa dying? Because the poverty rate is high and they don't have enough money to by simple things like medicine and mosquito nets to prevent AIDS, Malaria, and other infectious diseases.

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2 blondes were heading to Disney world, they saw up ahead that said "Disney World left" then took a left and enjoyed Disney World and had fun on the rides

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Why do black guys always have sex on their mind? Because they are men.

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What can never be seen by the owner, looks like Jesses mom, and smeels like shit. Jesses dick.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why can't a chicken cross a road without it being questioned?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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