what is the difference between a puppy and a baby... ...they are different animals

Confucius says, I hear and I forget. I see and I remember. I do and I understand.

A man walks in to a bar, Has a drink, and leaves.

Yo mama so fat that she probably has a thyroid problem.

Why couldn't the kitten drink its milk? Because its owner was neglecting him and the kitten later died of malnurisment

Why does 1+1=2? Dunno, e-mail me if you do.

Why did dallin fall off the swing he got hit by jds big penis

Why did the sloth fall out of the tree? Because sloths often confuse their arm with a branch, grab on and fall to their deaths.

How many frogs does it take to change a light bulb None. Frogs lack the cranial capacity to change said lightbulb. If eventually by evolution they become smart enough to change lightbulbs, they may learn to handle machinery and pose a real threat to humans

Why does Chuck Norris always know the time? He bought a fancy new watch.

Irish man English man and a Scottish man all in a plane they jump out then they land

oh, brown loaf is fine, i'm on my bike.

Q: What is tall, white, and shaped like a house? A: a tall white man, if you break his limbs and twist them into the rectangular shape of a house.

Why did Michael Jackson name his kid blanket? Because after years of drug abuse and sexual insecurity led to him thinking unrealistically during the birth of his children.

What did the black man eat at a picnic? I don't know, I wasn't there.

Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No. Well, neither has he.

Text this number just cuz 16305208722

I do like haikus even when they are random refrigerator

according to the ewspickle, it is Dumbledore's favorite food.

what do you call an octopus with 9 tentacles? a male octopus

Do you know what would happen if Hitler was still alive today. Nothing he's not.

what do you call a man with a bullet hole in his leg? A man who needs t see a doctor.

Knock knock, Who's there? Justin Bieber, LEAVE!

Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...