What's the first thing that goes through a persons mind when they get shot in the head. The bullet.

How did the deaf girl die? I beeped but she didnt hear me

i am an arrow and i did not hit your knee!f

What do you call a man with a spade in his head? Dead.

Whats a six letter name for black people? Friend.

What did the college student do during her Spring Break in Mexico? We're not sure, she never came back.

Why did the black man have no toes? Because during his climb of Everest, he got frostbite and they had to be amputated.

Why did the chicken cross the road? he has an iq of 5 like all chickens

What is green and slow Grass.

Knock Knock! Who's there? The doctor. You have aids.

A fat man orders a pizza. Then after eating it, he gets a eart attack due to his high cholesterol and lack of exercise

There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

Your Mom is so fat she's Fat

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the turkey was in the oven and all the farm animals thought the chicken could run the errands in his place just fine.

Q: What is the difference between a smart blonde and a UFO? A: One is a human while the other is an unidentified flying object.

What do u call 2 black people in the front of a car 3 in the back and 2 on top of the car going off a clif? A waste u can fit 2 more in the trunk

* two sisters are making yo mama jokes* * mom turns around* mom: Hey yo mama so stupid ... sister one: ummmm.... sister two: sure thats not you?

What is pink, red and silver and crawls into walls? A baby with forks in it's eyes

Why was the giant centipede full? Because it just ate half a dozen purebred golden retriever puppies by hiding all day in the poopy newspapers and emerging at night to eat the defenseless baby dogs in their sleep. BUM BUM BUM KSSSH!

A Serbian Film

every time I stay in the water too long my pp gets all shriverly sometimes can't find it omg that's so weird

Why did the spy cross the road? To get to the other hide.

So you're flying around in your bathtub, how pancakes to shingle a doghouse? Airhockey, because pizza bagels can't cry.

Whats brown and rhymes with Snoop? Dr. Dre

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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