Three men on a journey stop at a farm and ask the farmer if they might be allowed to stay the night. The farmer consents upon one condition: that the visitors not lay a hand on his daughter. The men respected the farmers wishes and left in the morning.

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What do you call a horse standing alone in an empty field? Tesco's own Beef Lasagne.

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Is Mike here? Mike Hunt? Has anyone seen Mike Hunt? Yes teacher, he is home sick with the flu.

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a duck was clearing out his apartment when he came across a rat. the rat turned into a genie. 'i will grant you 3 wishes' said the genie. 'whats the catch?' replied the duck 'can i touch your dinkle?'

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Q:What happens when you choke a smurf? A: Nothing because smurfs dont exist

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Neo Nero, why did you not tell me that Nero7 is dead? When was the funeral held? Where is he buried? At point Zero? Please I need to know, he was basically my father, or rather all that my father never was, at least I dont have to wonder if he will ever come back... I understand your anger, even if I am not even close to following your extreme ideals, please tell me the code, the proof that you are not one of the Spetznas or the Nazi`s. "Eliza"

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Doctor Doctor, I keep getting horrible boils all over my face! Okay then. Take off your underwear and we'll see what's going on.

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http://www.pollsb.com/photos/o/355988-gay_marriage.jpg

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what would Jesus do? Get crucified and die.

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your friend is gay, but you are not. nothing happens

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I'm sorry but your child seems to have fractured his spinal column and can no longer control any part of his body below his neck.

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how do you boil oil? add b to oil

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Two muffins are sitting on a counter. One muffin says to the other "hello." The other muffin says "Oh my god a talking muffin!"

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Why are orphans so bad at baseball? They don't know where home is.

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Roses are Red And sometimes yellow My mother is mellow I have terminal cancer. I also fisted my grandpa's anus last night

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Why isn't Michael Jackson good at chess? Because he's dead.

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How do unwed mothers celebrate Mother's Day? The same way all mothers do.

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You know what's funny? You can't spell manslaughter without laughter.

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a woman walks into a bar, she was quickly kicked out and escorted back to the kitchen

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What do you get when you cross The Incredible Hulk and King Kong? Two angry fictional characters.

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Haikus are good poems, They don't always make sense though, I saw a squirrel.

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A duck walks into a bar. The bartender says what will it be? The duck replies "lemonade!"

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Why did the dog bark? Because he wanted to.

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Knock knock. Who's there? You. You who? Fuck you.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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