How do you help someone stop drowning You take your foot off the back their head.

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"Ask me if I'm a tree!" "Are you a tree?" "No."

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What did the Rabbi say when the Priest asked how his family was? The Rabbi breaks into tears as he explains his family was killed in the Holocaust.

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What did the man say when he walked into a bar? Nothing because he got knocked out because he was running too fast and hit his head.

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Looking's for free... Touching's for free.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Probably because it saw some food, or because it felt threatened on the side of the road it was already on.

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what happened to the batsman with bad footwork? he got out what did the batsman do when he got out? he left the ground due to the nature of the ruling

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Roses are red violets are blue i have HIV you should probably get yourself checked...

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Knock Knock Who's there? The electrician, I'm here to fix your door bell.

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Yo mumma so poor that she dosent have any money

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How do you punish Helen Keller? Sit her in the corner and deprive her of things she likes to do.

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why did the man fall off his bike? someone threw an oven at him

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Q. What did the barber say to the Italian kid? A. Do you want your hair cut or should I just change the oil.?

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Roses are red, violets are blue, Gee, I wish I could partake in even the first two lines of this stanza, but alas, I have colourblindness.

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Where do drunk asians live? In their house or apartment with their families, who are concerned about his drinking.

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why don't bears wear shoes? because they have bear feet

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Q: Whats worse than spilling milk? A: Cancer Q: Whats worse than cancer? A: Rebecca Black

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How many kids with ADHD does it take to change a lightbulb? I dont know lets go play on our bikes.

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Whats worse them finding a worm in your apple??? finding out your adopted

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Fact: 100% of people who drink alcohol will die.

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Why did the elephant cross the road? To run away from the angry chicken who was mad that he was slacking off work.

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There once was an old lady who lived in a shoe. She had so many children, her vagina fell off.

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A farmer hears a knock at the door on a rainy night. He opens the door and welcomes an attractive young man in. The farmer gets his budding teenage daughter to fetch the man a towel. He dries himself off, thanks them both, and goes to bed. He's gone before anyone else wakes up and leaves a fifty on the table.

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Why did Justin Beiber cut his hair It had grown to long

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops