Why did the girl fall off of the swing? Because she had no arms.

One day I walked into my backyard I saw a squirrel Then I was like oh hey squirrel

Why does a man have a closet full of fruits? Because he has a mental illness and there is nothing to laugh about.

A man shaves at least 3 times a week, yet he has the longest beard in town, how is that possible? He shaves his head because he's embarrassed about his rampant and patchy balding.

Roses are red, Violets are red, I stabbed someone in my garden, There's blood everywhere

the awkward moment when your mom wakes you up and you realize she died six years ago

Knock Knock Who's there? The Gastapo

1 + 1 = 2 If it was equal to 11 the problem would be impossible

What does an Asian do in a library in his school? Write one of these.

What time is it in China right now? I have no idea, it would depend on when you are reading this. Perhaps you should look at a world clock, watch, or some other sort of time-telling device rather than humorous website. Its purpose is not to tell time. However, there are many other places for this. Good luck surfing the web, friend. I have aided you the best that I can. I only hope that you will find what you are looking for.

What did Marshawn Lynch say? Yeah

Hey guess whats funny? Matthew Mcconaughey Oh wait, never mind

Your mommas so stupid she decided to go to night school to better her self. She got a degree in business and finance and is now a manager for HSBC

Knock Knock I have a f*cking doorbell you asshole

What's louder than a cat stuck in a tree? A foghorn.

9/11 my birthday

whats the difference between a European and a african an african has more pigment in his skin due to prolonged exposure to light

Why was little Timmy mauled by a bear? He poked it with a pointy stick.

How do you make a baby stop crying?you scream at it and throw it at wall

yo mamas so young shes gonna b born soon

What's black, white, and red all over? A: Me after domestic abuse.

Why did the man lose the a race? 'Cause he has no legs

Thats so awesome, I was totally not not going to tell you and when I saw I did not not type it I totally did it anyways, but why did it last even though stuff timed out? I am like so wet.

A man walked in to a store and asked for four candles. The storeman brought some fork handles and placed them on the counter. The customer said "No... 'Four Candles' a rather amusing sketch performed by The Two Ronnies, a comedy double act in the 1970s."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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