Why did the chicken cross the road? It was suicidal.

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Patient: Doctor, do I have cancer? Doctor: Yes. Patient: Will I live? Doctor: No. Patient: So what do I do? Doctor: SUCK IT UP!!!

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What you call it when 8 goes over 4? An improper fraction.

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What did Timmothy get when he got back from his vacation in a tropical destination? Malaria.

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What is the difference between 100 dead babies and a ferrari? You can't find a ferrari in my garage.

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Reality is often boring. TV is often bad for you. Reality TV is boring AND bad for you.

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i found the cure to cancer.......AIDS

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What do you call an attractive woman in a blender? A very rare occurrence.

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why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side.

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Haikus are easy But sometimes they don't make sense Refrigerator

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Two guys walk into a bar.... OUCH

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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You: That was awful. Me: You know what else is awful? You: What? Me: This joke.

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When you see birds flying in a V why is one side of the V always longer than the other? there are more birds on that side

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse says nothing because it is a horse and doesn't understand English. It gets confused about it's surroundings and gallops out of the bar, upending a few tables along the way.

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What happened when Chuck Norris jumped into the pool? He then got water on him, and later had to dry off.

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how many Arabs and Jews can you fit on a bus? The bus in question is a 56 seater,so 56. If you cram some people in the aisles you could probably fit 65 if you didn't care about anyone's comfortability sheesh you might even for in 100 or more.

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One man calls emergency: - Come immediately, my little son has swallowed a condom! After five minutes, the same man calls back: - It is OK, I found another one.

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person 1: Do you have a christmas necklace I could borrow for a party? person 2: I have a one with a leprechaun.

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Why did the Chicken cross the road? The light was red, which prompted the chicken to cross safely.

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Q.what do you call a dead baby? A. a dead baby

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I'm using my hand but thinking of you.

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what's funnier then 15? definitely not 14

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Who would win in a fight between superman and flash? Chuck Norris

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops