Why from a friends phone? I demand a full explanation, here, you got my number, you got my home address, and who the hell was that crying little bitch on the phone? I got friends in the UK which owe me some money, and nothing to lose, if I have to take care of you before you take care of me and even possibly my wife in the crossfire, I will take you down and everything in my path! Moral: Got ya!.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the chicken cross the road?

thumb_up thumb_down +2

I'm not saying your mom's ugly, but I like pancakes.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the black guy lose the race? He toke an arrow to the knee

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What did one cat say to the other cat? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A pig walks into a bar and says, "Oink."

thumb_up thumb_down +2

why are you reading these jokes? i have nothing else to do. ok

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why didnt the cannibal like the taste of the comedian? because the comedian smelled very bad and the cannibal forgot to add salt.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the black man get a welfare check? Because he was either unemployed and decided he wanted someone to keep feeding his family, or decided to push forth the unfortunate stereotype of African-Americans not wanting to work and being lazy. Or maybe he didn't, why don't you ask him?

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why was Katy Perry naked with your mom? Because they were having sex

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Variants: :) I will always assist you in whatever you want. :( I want to kill you all by myself! Sense? Non? Fuck? Mind? Fission Mailed? Impossible Mission.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did it take Da Vinci so long to paint the Sistine Chapel? Because it was painted by Michelangelo.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the fox cross the road? To chew on the chicken carcass.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A bald man walks out a bar crying Prostate cancer

thumb_up thumb_down +2

When u send someone fudge, u must send a note along with it! Roses are red Violets are blue Fudge is brown Here's some fudge

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Adam Turkolowoskiaklfadjufsdjksbgsgsafafdsg

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What do you call a baby with a shadow? A shadow-baby!

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A boy with one arm walks into a rock climbing facility and quickly realizes that his dream of being a rock climber is impossible because he is blind.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

I may have Alzheimer's, but at least I don't have Alzheimer's.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

An elephant walks into a bar. Several people are trampled.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Schizophrenia will affect over 1.5 million people this year. At least, thats what my flying, albino pet rhinoceros told me.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What do you call your mom? Mom

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Whats the difference between a Ferrari and a dead baby? I don't a Ferrari in my garage

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops